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How do you get a man to admit he is cheating?

Been having problems.... he's been staying out all weekend and weeknights for weeks.... says he's been down the shore with biker buddies, but his credit card history says he's been in the complete opposite direction..... when confronted he said his credit card must have been stolen, his credit card was in his walet... said his # was stolen somehow.... went to the station to file a report... he called ahead and told the Cops there's been no crime... I know in my heart he is cheating... But I keep failing to prove it... I'm not leaving... It's my house to... he wants out... he cheats... he can leave... but he wants to buy me out, and I'm trying my hardest not to give in... credit card history reveiled he also saw a lawyer... How do I get him to admit he's cheating? or how do I prove it? I can't afford a P.I. ( I've already consulted with a few) PLEASE HELP!... I am desperate! and on the verge of a breakdown (27 yrs) :-(

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Aug. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (18)
  • tell him to get out of your house.... you can't make anyone admit to something
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • Guys are so damn stubborn...it's like they really believe themselves when they lie. I think you have enough proof...kick him out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:23 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • grab him by the balls and demand the truth. It works, get the balls and squeeze harder everytime he tells a lie. It's like shock therapy, he will give in because no man want's to lose their jewels.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • Kick his lying cheating ass out of your home. Tell him if he wants it then HE can hire the lawyer to get it for him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • If he's leaving that obvious of a trail, start to follow it. I'm sure you will find a routine, also start monitoring his cell phone on line, and call and request a copy of his texts, if he texts. Does he have a computer, add a key logger to his computer. Can his cell phone have a GPS added to it, they do that to track kids. You can also, purchase a GPS to put in his vehicle and follow his location. I'll throw this in for fun...call that show Cheaters and let them do the work. Good Luck....that sucks.
    doublefistin

    Answer by doublefistin at 12:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • Tell him to get f*** out!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:27 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • If he's seen a lawyer, I'd recommend you get one, too. Not sure what state you're in, but in MD you only have to show evidence of opportunity & intent - I think you've got that w/the CC Statement. Any chance you can get a hold of phone records, too - showing evidence of contact on those same dates? I think you KNOW what's going on, just because he's too cowardly to admit it, doesn't change the facts that you have in your hands. I'm so sorry for you, I've been there & it totally sucks.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • If He Is Cheating Well Then Let Him Go ! And Let Him Know Your Better Off With Out Him and You can Find Somebody Worth Your time!
    Texmama392

    Answer by Texmama392 at 12:30 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • OP HERE: HE WON'T LEAVE... I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE MY HOUSE OR MY HUSBAND... I BELIEVE MARRIAGE IS "FOREVER", BUT HE SAYS HE DON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE... (SPOUSES FALL IN AND OUT OF THEIR FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER, BUT LOVE IS A DECISION NOT AN FEELING, IT IS A COMMITMENT, IT CAN BE EMOTIONAL OR TEND TO HAVE LACK OF EMOTION, BUT IT IS NOT AN EMOTION... WE TOOK VOWS) I AM CHRISTIAN AND BELEIVE THAT THE ONLY REASON FOR DIVORCE BIBLICALLY IS IF THERE IS ADULTURY INVOVLED.... BESIDES THAT THE ONLY WAY I WILL GET THE HOUSE, AND GET THE MEANS TO PAY FOR THE HOUSE (BY ALOMONY) IS IF I CAN PROVE HE'S BEEN CHEATING.... BUT HOW CAN I DO THAT?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • I believe you are incorrect in your statement about proving adultery is the only way you can keep your house and get alimony. Check your state statutes but alimony normally is given after many years of marriage and if you prove to the court that you cannot work and provide for the children outside the home. Adultery has nothing to do with the house either. The court can make you sell the house and split the money and get on with your life. Keep in mind that just bc he isn't where he says he is doesn't mean he is cheating.Some men just like being alone or to get away from the house and responsibilities. He might think you wouldn't understand that or that you may want him staying home with you and the kids. As for the Chrisitan thing, is he a believer? If not, then you are unequally yoked and God says that's not a good thing. God may have someone more suitable for you in mind. (I heard that from a Christian author years ago)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:57 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

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