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Fighting at School.

If your children were toi be bullied and the bully were to hit your child would you teach your child that as long as they didn't throw the first punch it's okay to get into a tussle? or that violence is never the answer? When I was younger as long as we didn't start the fight we didn't get into trouble and if we won the fight my dad was a little more apt to take us out to get a cheeseburger or ice cream. I plan on teaching my son the same principle. You never start a fight but you should always end them. What about you? What will your children be taught?


Asked by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Aug. 27, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I'm dealing with this right now...I just got a call from the school saying my son got in a fight but they questioned both the boys and the other boy admitted he punched my son first and my son was just fighting back. On one hand, I don't want my son fighting and getting in trouble but on the other, I want him to be able to stand up for himself and defend himself when someone picks on him. So I'm thinking a couple days without his video games should be a proper punishment, but I don't know about anything beyond that since he didn't start the fight.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:31 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • that doesnt work in some schools. My daughter was jumped and she got suspended because she faught back. I have taught my children to defend themselves...however I will be the one doing the butt kicking if they ever start a fight.

    Answer by mamakirs at 4:10 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • I have tried teaching my children other ways to deal with things. now after having it happen to my oldest where someone hit him and he tried to go to the teachers to deal with it and all the child got was a slap on the wrist, I have told him if someone hits him first then fight back. I dont like violence but I wont have my child just sit there and take a beating. If our school enforced their own policies then it would be different. Sadly the one time this did happen and my son did nothing the other child got off easy because his mom was friends with the principal.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:38 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • We always told my DS to try to tell a teacher if he was being bullied, after months of being bullied in 7th grade and DS talking to everyone from the teacher in the hallway to the frickin principle and nothing being done he came home one day talking about it again I said " can you take him?Kick his ass, let him throw the first punch but kick his ass and he wont bother you again". Thanks to frickin "zero tolerence" MY SON got suspended and the other kid got in school suspension! WTF!?!?! I got a call from the asst. pricniple when they did it and asked where the "zero tolerence" was for the past 2 months when this kid was shoving him every f'in day when he passed him in the hall and the B tried telling me she was not aware of that! I know for a fact she was b/c I called her assistant 2 days before! So she said because DS got the better of the bully he had out of school and the other kid ISS! CONT.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 5:07 PM on Aug. 27, 2009

  • Cont....I asked her if the other kid was hurt- I didn't want him like on the way to the ER or something she said no so I said right to the B "Well then I'm glad my son kicked his ass maybe now he'll leave him alone!" I called the principle about the suspension and was told that if a kid gets in a fight even if it is self-defense both are automatically suspended and the other kid got in school because they were afraid his parents wouldn't know he was suspended and with 3 days off he might get arrested!
    In the end when DS got home we talked about it, let him gloat a bit- he was feeling good about the bullying probably being over- but did make him use his 3 days off doing housework so suspension didn't seem like a good idea in the future.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 5:13 PM on Aug. 27, 2009