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Am I the only one that thinks losers don't get trophies??

Maybe it's just me, but I grew up in a world where First place was the place to be. Second & Third were not bad either. You didn't get a prize for being last accross the finish line. You learned to get better or deal. I hate this idea that everyone wins. They don't all win. And real life surely isn't like that. If you score the lowest on your test, you don't still get an A, if you screw up your presentation you don't still get a raise...

So, why do this for children? Isn't it healthier to teach them to deal with disapointment at a young age?

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Asked by SabrinaMBowen at 12:55 PM on Aug. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 40 (122,988 Credits)
Answers (44)
  • I agree. Exactly right. I never expected a trophy, neither did my kids ....if you win, then that's fine. If you don't win, then you just try harder next time. And ...who is to say that winning or getting 2nd or 3rd place is even that important? It is good to be a part of the team effort.

    Answer by Lindalu2 at 12:59 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I am not a fan either. Its the same with everyone makes the team. No, some people make the team, and if you didnt, you work hard and try again next year.
    I think its the same with dumbing down society. I mean seriously, a box of rice a roni, or pasta, I read has instructions for using two boxes! People really can add? Its crazy

    Answer by AmandaN1 at 12:59 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • sticking out tongueLOSER! LOL


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I absolutely agree. I answer a post with a response stating exactly that yesterday. the real world doesn't pat everyone on the head and say no one is better than the other. It is a disservice to our children. Losing is an opportunity to teach your child sportsmanship, how to press on, how to wor harder for something they really want.. I am sick of the 'no losers' state of play.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:07 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • My husband is a coach and he has to deal with this all the time. Sadly, many parents believe participation is enough to garner an award. I, too, think the best, brightest and hardest working should earn top honors. If not, what's the point of trying or doing your best if everyone is going to be rewarded equally?

    Answer by lvpenguino at 1:08 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I guess, these days they figure they better do something or little "Timmy's" mom will make a big stink cause her little boy didn't get a participation award. My son looked at me at the end of last hockey season and said, " but we didn't win ya know," when he was given a trophy. He was kinda confused by it I think. I just told him, "But they think you did an awesome job." What else was I supposed to say? And some parents have grown to expect it because of all the money they fork over to play the rediculously priced sports. I dunno. I thinks it's dumb. you win... you get a trophy. you lose, you get a pat on the back and try again.

    Answer by mom2BOYZnDad at 1:11 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • first second and third place give you something to reach for a goal to obtain.....I teach my kids to be good losers AS WELL AS good winners. if you win great! If you lose...did you have fun? did you play your best? did you learn how to play the game better or learn what you did wrong? the real world does not hire everyone, everyone doesn't always get a raise I want my kids to know what to expect in life. Not think that every thing is easy

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:11 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I agree that not everyone should make the team or get a prize. However, I do think ALL children who participate should be recognized (just a kind word or a pat on the back) for doing their best. son works his butt off at football but he just isn't really that good. He always has to play offensive or defensive line and never receives any "glory" like scoring a touchdown or catching an amazing pass. It wouldn't hurt if just once a coach or teammate patted him on the helmet and said "Good Job".

    Answer by Dyndudes at 1:17 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • do i think its necessary for everyone to get a trophy no. when i played sports as a kid up til about the age of 12 everyone got a trophy at the end of the year, regardless of where our teams placed, and those that had been better worked harder whatever got diff awards as well. we all knew it was just a "loser" trophy, it does nothing for a kids self esteem in making them happy they got a trophy, they know its just b/c the grown ups don't want their feelings hurt. some kids yes i think need the encouragement to try again next time, but most know what is going on and it just makes them feel like a loser. regarding the comment about everyone making the team, up til a certain age, like middle school, everyone should be permitted to play. the only way to learn is to be taught and sports as a young child teach other things as well, so every child should have the chance regardless of skill

    Answer by vabchmommy at 1:22 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • i agree minus the first place is the way to be line.. first or last as long as u played your heart out and had fun thats what matters

    Answer by peytonJJ27 at 1:22 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

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