Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you have a will stating who gets your kids if you die?

Who gets them? Me and DH can't agree. He wants his parents but they are mean to kids. They beat them, and make them do so much work around the house. More than they do. It's like parenting is a big power trip to them. My parents are too old. Siblings are all wacko. He has an aunt that I really like but we barely know her. He thinks it would be wrong to pick her over his parents. Hopefully nothing ever happens. I'm sure with no will they will go to his parents.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Aug. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • Yes we do. We did when our own boys were minors and now we do with our adopted grandkids. Anything can happen. You need to make arrangements for them to avoid something like state agencies stepping in in the case of a tragic accident. My sister will take these two if something were to ever happen.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:36 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • We cuttently have the will stating that they go to a Borther-in -law. They are great people, but finacially straped and we have decided on a different religoin for our children, so I want to change it. I don't want my kids to be a burden and at such a stressful time I don't want a change in religion. I haven't had a realtionship with my older sister in 2 decades and my younger sister who I am close to just enlisted and is over seas. And her hubby is a terrible head in the sand type parent. So I am thinking of my cousin they are great parents and have kids mines age. I pray that nothing happens anytime soon, I want to talk to them about it first.

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 1:40 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • No, but it's understood that his younger sister and her husband would raise him in the church like we would want.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Well, for us it's simple. MY mother is all there is. The rest of the family is dead...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 2:39 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I have something written and notarized that says my parents will get custody if I die. That way there is no confusion and my kids' fathers won't try and pull shit.

    Answer by MommyKKay at 3:00 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Yes. We redo it every 2 years and we switch back and forth between my parents and his. We love both of them and both of them love our kids. It was too hard for us to decide, so we did it this way. Both are aware of the situation, and they know if something were to happen to us, it would just depend on whose 2 year term it was. :)

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 3:02 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • No - right now, if I die their dad would get custody. When he dies (we were told he has 5-10 years left about 4 years ago), my husband and I will create a will stating that our kids go to my parents (his parents are too old). If my parents death precedes mine, then they in most likelihood will go to my unmarried brother - he wants kids and loves mine to pieces, just has never found the right girl, and he definitely has the financial means to provide for them. But I won't broach the subject with him unless my parents die before my kids reach adulthood.

    Answer by missanc at 3:14 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I really, really want to. My husband and I have talked about it so many times, but we just can't decide on anyone. His parents were abusive to him growing up, so even though they are great with my kids now, I wouldn't want them to have them permanently,'cause there is a big difference between visiting and having them all the time. My dad was also abusive, so he wouldn't get them. My mom is just unstable. She never seems to make good decisions on anything. All of our siblings are out of the question for various reasons. So we just don't know what to do...just pray that nothing happens to us.

    Answer by ginger813 at 3:26 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Being a single mother I've had my will written for a few years now, my children would go to Japan a friend of the family (their god father) lives there, He is a great guy who can more then provide for them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • we have a 24 and a 31 yr old daughters...the 24 yr old will get my daughter..she will get the house and live in it and raise my 10 yr old until she goes out on her witch time the house will be divided 3 ways...and some of the insurance will go towards my daughters college...we have discussed this with them and they agree.i am 50 and my husband is 55 so we are not spring chickens and awful as it is we had to think of this...

    Answer by nana77500 at 3:36 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.