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Husband and money

Lately I've been noticing a trend in the financial part of the relationship. My husband makes all the final decisions on pretty much anything. I don't work but I take care of our 2 children(3 and 7). He made a comment a couple of weeks ago that when I go back to work I can do whatever I want with the money but he wants to use enjoy his money. Hes also very grouchy when he comes and barely talks to me. Doesn't even talk whan hes around my family (only, not his).What do you think?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:51 PM on Aug. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • He's being very selfish. How about he stays home with the kids while you go to work and then you get to make the money decisions? Who does he think is watching the kids while he goes off to work everyday? You have a job - it's a SAHM. I would be ticked if my dh ever had that type of attitude - you are married, it's not HIS money, it's for BOTH of you.
    You need to have a serious talk with him about what's happening, how you're feeling, why he's acting so childish. I would definitely recommend some counseling.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 2:56 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Had a talk with him still feels that hes the one in control. I've been married for 10 years and I really can't take it anymore.
    helpless01

    Answer by helpless01 at 3:08 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I think he's being selfish.. But if I were you, not that your kids are older.. I'd go back to work.. And split up all the chores to do at him, and let him have his part.. Then let him decide whether he wants you to work.. or whether he wants you to be a housewife and share.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Then tell him you're going back to work. Get daycare rates and tell him how much his share (50%) will be of the daycare. I agree with anon - split up the household chores and give him a list of what his chores will be along with the daycare rates. Ask him if he still wants you to work.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 3:16 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • He is being a selfish jerk. My DH brought up to me once that he was tired of being broke and that I should go back to work. I said fine, I'll go back to work, you can pay the daycare since you make twice what I'll make. Then we can divide up the rest of the bills, rent, utilites, etc. See how broke we are then. Tell yours that and see what he thinks of you working then.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • i would start charging him the same amount the local daycare would for your services also what a maid would charge at the end of the week let hime see how much money he has left over!
    toledoohiomom

    Answer by toledoohiomom at 3:35 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • You need a counselor. Serious marriage counseling, this is no joke.
    baboosmom

    Answer by baboosmom at 4:29 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I had this exact issue over 20 years ago. I decided to get estimates on daycare provider and a housekeeper. Then i divided the amount by 50% an said... This is how much money you would be paying someone to do the WORK I DO FOR FREE.... He never again complained when I spent money on a personal item again. If this dont wake him up to the fact that your work is a JOB and YOU are investing into the home with the work YOU do.. then it is serious time for a family/marriage counslor.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:01 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

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