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Would you be upset if your best friend....

I have been in dire need of a part time sitter twice a week thur and fri 230pm-600pm which I would pay $20 per day..not too much to ask. Well I didnt ask my best friend but I assumed if she could do it she would. Well she quit her job at a tanning salon like 3months ago so she could help her mom out who has cancer. She has been my friend for 5years now and we have been very close because my father passed away of cancer 4years ago and I am helping her through the struggle.
I rarely ask her to babysit for me, on Thur I texted her and asked her what time she gets out of school. She said she goes in a 7 but she picked up a nanny job that starts at 3? Im thinking to myself what is the hell I wouldnt be so offended if it was another job but a nanny job? She knows that I stress over not having a sitter all the time. I really got my feeling hurt but she doesnt think anything of it. Should I say something to her?? Am I being selfish?

Answer Question
 
TSSN88

Asked by TSSN88 at 4:33 PM on Aug. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Level 5 (78 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Maybe she didn't plan to get or take that job, but at short notice did for whatever reason, I bet her mind is cluttered right now and I don't think offending you or not wanting to help you had anything to do with it, I don't think you should be offended.
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 4:37 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • You are being Selfish
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:43 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • well to be honest, it sounds to me like you didnt even ask her, you just assumed she was going to take the position. so yes your being selfish if you did not ask her. but if you did ask her and she said she would do it and totally blew you off then no your not being selfish.
    BUDDHASBABY1

    Answer by BUDDHASBABY1 at 4:52 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • and $20 a day for 3 1/2 hours thats a rip off
    BUDDHASBABY1

    Answer by BUDDHASBABY1 at 4:53 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • well thanks for the advice moms but BUDDASBABY1 if you have kids that is what everysitter ive ever had charged for a 3yr old that is potty trained for an entire day not part time so excuse me for being so damn CHEAP.
    TSSN88

    Answer by TSSN88 at 5:09 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Did you actually ask her to babysit? Maybe she didn't realize that you wanted her, what with her mom and school on her mind. Maybe it's for the best, it's not always a good idea to mix friends/family and business.
    benjamink

    Answer by benjamink at 5:15 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • From what you said, it sounds like you assumed she would not be available or able to watch your children, so you didn't ask her. Since you didn't ask her, she was free to make her own decisions and plans without consulting you.

    While I understand and empathize with the stress over finding a sitter (been there, DONE THAT!), you can't reasonably expect her to be sitting waiting for the off-chance you ask her to babysit.
    geminilove

    Answer by geminilove at 5:18 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I get tired of 'friends' always expecting me to pick up the slack when they need a sitter. It gets real old real quick. Plus they never want to pay what everyone would pay. One never offeres a penny. So now I'm the bitch who says sorry..can't do it anymore. Less 'friends' but a lot less being used too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Yeah, you said yourself you ASSUMED she would watch your kid but did you ever ASK her? You also said you rarely ask her to babysit so why would you be mad that she took another job instead of sitting around just in case you happen to need her? Also, maybe the nanny job pays more than you do? Just because she's your friend doesn't mean she should sacrifice her finances for the sake of you needing child care.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:31 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Let's see: Assume ASS of U and ME. You should have asked her!!!! and maybe the other job pays more????
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:31 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

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