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Stress, stress, and more stress....

Omg, my life is falling apart. Me and my SO are the worst budgeters in the world even though we try our hardest. And since we cant really figure out where all our money goes we dont have enough to fix our failing car. We both have school and he works because my check would barely cover over childcare for our 6 month DD. We have to find a new babysitter (and pay money now) because my mom cant stop drinking for two days out of the fricken week. Its been horrible trying to find one that wont charge up the ass for the three hrs shes there. And if I cant find one a snowball effect happens where I have to drop my classes, pay back the money from the government for school (funds we dont have), delay our plans for the future, etc. On top of that the house is always dirty (there are two others besides us living here that dont really clean), we always have homework, cant find time to go food shopping, DD needs a lot of attention, etc...

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:31 PM on Aug. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (13)
  • What area do you live? (child care).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:36 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • there's ton of other things too (like the fact that my SO doesn't understand why he has to pay off his credit card for example)....I just dont know what to do......I need a vacation lol...

    OP here btw
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • ((hugs)) can you find a college student that could watch your dd for the few hours a week? do you go to church? maybe someone there
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I live in Hemet, CA. Dont worry, I'm getting that part done. I'm mainly just venting unless someone has a great idea.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • if you don't pay your credit card payment (for example) on time...that messes up your credit score...adding more stress- just a few payments and you're screwed...

    credit cards are evil
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • I recently found mu babysitter on craigslist ::gasp:: no really. I interviewed several by email and narrowed it down. Followed up with a reference check and home visit. The one we pick keep my DD 4 days a week for 75 dollars plus some food. Also look into online classes. they can be logged into at any time so you can do school while the little one is in bed. Write down your income and outcome on a sheet of paper. write down all of the due dates by the bill in the list of outcomes. Don't forget gas and groceries. Find out what you need to pay bills and put that money into a separate account form your spending gas and grocery money. (yes two accounts) That way when you are spending you are certain you are not spending essential bill money. If the outcome is less than the income try alternating certain bills like gas and elec. You would stay a month behind but they wouldn't turn you off.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:45 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Set aside one 1/2 day a week where all you do is spend time with DD. Like sat mornings at a local park and them lunch. This is a break for you to. The house staying dirty is not that big of a deal as long as you aren't starting any mold farms :0) Just try to relax and get the important stuff done. do a load of laundry every other day. don't stress about folding it either! Keep the dishes clean and the bathroom clean. Everything else you can squeeze in when you can. Make your self a daily itinerary. It sounds stupid but it really helps. Example My mon-Thurs: 7-1:30 work 1:30-2 run errands 2-2:30 pick up DD 2:30-3:30 clean kitchen and play with DD some 330-430 Pick up living room. Start dinner 430-530 DD and DD get T.v. Time (I'm free) and cook dinner 5:30 dinner 630 DD bath 7 DD bed DS bath 730 DS bed 730-10 (I'm free or cleaning/laundry) You need to sit down and sift through things and figure out what you
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:52 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • can and can not do. Most importantly. Learn to say no with out guilt. Such as 'Can you cover and extra shift?' Your answer ' no.' notice no explanation was given. Explanations open you up to guilt trips. You can do this!! I know i struggle but this helps.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:54 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • you and your husband need to carry around small notebooks and write down every penny you spend.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:57 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

  • Some colleges have babysitting available. I see that rkoloms already suggested my next thought, was that you both need to write down every cent you spend. You'll be surprised at where it all goes. I've tried it. Then see what you can cut down on. Every single extra needs to be stopped. If it helps sweeten this bitter pill, it isn't forever. This is a rough time for you, but it will get better.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 9:09 PM on Aug. 28, 2009

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