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Do you think families compete with their children?

I have a 3 yr. old daughter and my DH's sister has a 2 yr. old daughter. Sometimes I feel like we compete with the girls. I have caught myself doing it and not even meaning to. My SIL copies alot of the things I do, which drives me nuts! But why do we do this? My sister is getting ready to have a baby and I don't think I will be that way with her baby girl!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Aug. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • i think they do compete. we all like to think our child is better than anyone in the family.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • could it be that your SIL thinks you are a good parent and is trying to emulate you instead of compete?

    mamak57

    Answer by mamak57 at 3:54 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I agree with mamak57 my sil asked me how we did it with our son so it is think of it in a positive light.
    robinsi2000

    Answer by robinsi2000 at 4:40 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • My sil does that with me and my sister. My sister and I both found out in the same week we were both pregnant. My sil did not like the whole family was showering us with attention. She told my brother they were going to get pregnant and since their baby would be the youngest they would get all the attention. My brother didn't care he just wanted sex.lol The next two times my sister was pregnant within two month my sil was pregnant.

    We bought a house she made my brother sell their house and they bought a bigger one. We bought a cabin at the lake she bought a bigger cabin and they never use it since she hates the lake. We went to Europe for a month they went for two months. When my son started kindergarten she was angry her son missed the cut off and could not go. My son is in the gifted program she is trying to get her son in he is bright but not gifted and I feel bad for him. She is crazy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:29 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • im thinking yes there is competition between the two of you and im seeing that you might also think your al little better?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:39 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I think it can happen a lot more then most care to admit. This is one reason I try to just keep my kids in contact with the family, but not too close because the actions show me the truth. They clearly have kids they're closer to and make little effort to try to balance things out. I don't think they feel the other kids are better, but just that they have more of a bond due to the other parents struggling and being more needy of the grandparents then our family was and is. I am not signing my kids up for a competition of someone who chooses to try to be spiteful because I will not let them do whatever they want to my kids on their terms. I am the parent and if they want to distance from the kids because of a few simple rules that is their loss. Family shouldn't be competing against each other it should be working together on the same team.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:16 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

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