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Are stepparents really parents?

Responding to different posts on CM, I find it amazing how many mothers believe that stepmothers are not parents and how some mothers will say they are not a parent to the child.
I am a sm. I financially, mentally, emotionally and physically support my stepkids. I discipline, take care of them when they are sick, pick them up from school, take them to sports and help with homework. But most importantly I LOVE THEM!

My skids and I have a great relationship AND THEY CALL ME MOMMA!! *gasp!*

So, do you think that stepparents are parents?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Aug. 29, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (20)
  • I think of my step mom as more of a mom than my "real" mom. My mom was a truck driver so she was never there and my step mom basically raised me. I've considered and called my step-mom, mom from the time I was 8!

    Answer by HolliBerry21 at 3:56 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Hmm. I suppose I think the ones who are also the main caregivers are - but the ones who's step children are in joint custody of both of their birth parents - no, they are just their birth parents new husband/wife.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Yes, some are. The ones that do not do the things that you do for your skids are not considered parents in my eyes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I think you're a mother... if you act like one - whether you're biologically related to them or not.
    I've seen mothers who were completely unfit to be one - with their own blood related DS/DD.
    And I've seen adopted mothers and SM's who were absolutely fantastic.

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 3:58 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • They are called stepmom and stepdad for a reason...doesnt matter if the biological parents have joint custody or not. If they are taking on the parent role, then they are a parent to the child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Yes, my husband is a step-parent to my oldest daughter and she knows him as daddy and no one else. Her real dad abandoned her and if he marries his thing of a girlfriend she will not be her stepmom because she's never even met my child. But in your case yes you are definitely a true mother whether you gave birth to those kids or not.

    Answer by tnm786 at 4:02 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • It depends on the age of the kids when the SP comes into play, if the SP is a full time part of the kids lives or just a weekend and every other holiday type thing. If I was say 25 when my dad remarried, I wouldnt see that woman as my parent. But being I knew my stepmom at the age of 3, she did not raise me, I lives in a different state but I do see her as one of my parents, she did have a hand in raising me. It all depends. I think refering to the question, does the child see a SP as a parent and "most" kids do not see their SP as a parent. In your case it sounds rare, most dads do not have their kids full time for a step mom to raise them, the kids are usually there on occassion. There is alot of variations and grey area on this on. So I say yes and no depending on the situation and the age of the kids and how much time SP is with them.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 4:03 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Step mothers who try to act like they are the kids mother when the kid already has a loving mother and father are so unbeliveably annoying.
    It reminds me of kids playing mom with their dollies.

    if the kids don't have a real mom (dead, in prison, unfit, whatever) - then I think it's okay for the step-mom to take the place of her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Aug. 29, 2009


    Answer by older at 4:05 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I love my Soon to be step-children as if they my own. I am not there mother and I will never take that place of there mother nor would I ever want to take that place, My step children and I have a good relationship and always have had that kind of relationship. There mother and I get along great and we have there best interest in mind.

    Answer by raemommy at 4:10 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

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