Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should dad be allowed in the delivery room if he's loaded?

So, I am honored that my best friend of many years has asked me to be in the room when she delivers. She does not want dad in the room if he is loaded. He has a drinking problem,that's why they aren't together. He is constantly drunk and very unsupportive. Sadly this is his first child. She wants support during labor and all he does is be class clown @ birthing class. I am sad that he can't stay clean long enough to be there and that it's come to this. Should he still be there if he's drunk? Mixed feelings here.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Aug. 29, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (62)
  • NOPE! The hospital I go to asked a father to leave the night I was there because he was drunk/high
    HolliBerry21

    Answer by HolliBerry21 at 4:00 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • No one should be there if the mom doesn't want him/her there. If she's worried that he won't be supportive regardless of the reason, he is causing her unnecessary stress.

    Six_on_my_own

    Answer by Six_on_my_own at 4:00 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I personally wouldn't allow him to be in there, if I were in her shoes. Witnessing the birth of a child, especially your own is a very wonderous feeling, and it should not be marred by being drunk.
    That is sad that he can't stay clean long enough to witness the birth of his first child.
    I would possibly give him an ultimatum. Do not drink on delivery day or stay out.
    Depending on what kind of a drunk he is - I don't think the doctor would let him be in the room as well.
    K_Sawyer

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 4:01 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • If the mother wants her drunk husband there no one should be allowed to gainsay her, including hospital staff. It's about the birthing woman, not the nurse's sensibilities. If the mother DOESN'T want someone-anyone (including any individual on the hospital staff) they should leave. Period. It's 100% up to her.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 4:02 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • lol, i head my dad was wasted....or well on his way. it sucks truly...i wouldnt want him there if he was, maybe hell eventually regret the fact he missed out on something so special for a drink!!!
    sweetstkissez22

    Answer by sweetstkissez22 at 4:03 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Hello? I just said mom doesn't want him there! I also said they were not together. Never said it was her husband. There are liabilities involved with the hospital allowing someone who is intoxicated on hospital grounds if they are not a patient, especially during a medical procedure of any kind!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • I'm excited to be there. I guess in a weird way I'm doing what he shoul be doing. I'm definitly not complaining. I just feel sad that he's probably gonna miss out. It will be a truly amazing thing to experience.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • Birth is not a medical procedure.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 4:13 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • No! She can say something to the staff and tell them that they can have him leave if she does'nt want him in the room. Her nurse and you are the ones that have to be her voice and if he his drunk and making her uncomfortable and stressing her out then he needs to wait in the waiting room. GL to her and hopefully he can stop drunking for the birth for his first child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

  • No! And the hospital security will throw him out. He should have more respect for himself and his new baby than that. You dont need anyone around you like that when you are having a baby! Geeez!
    forevermom75

    Answer by forevermom75 at 4:28 PM on Aug. 29, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Pregnancy
just asking

Next question overall (Just for Fun)
Are stepparents really parents?