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What should I do? Almost 3yr old son getting bullied at church.

I just started going to a church with a Sunday school. Every time that I have picked my son who is almost 3 up he has had an altercation with a certain boy. He has come home three times with scratches and now today he was shoved by the boy. The boy is about my son's age. When I asked the teacher about it she sugar coated it and said that they are little.

I also send my son regularly to drop off classes. I have never had this happen there--I know all of the teachers there and they would tell me if something happened to him or if he instigated it.

So I am very perplexed and concerned that if this continues that it would not be a safe environment for him to go. He has also told me that it bothers him. I do not want his church experience to be that he is being bullied by another kid.

Am I overreacting? How do I handle this with the child's mom and the teacher?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:13 PM on Aug. 30, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (5)
  • I would definately have a little chat with the parents of the child. If he/she won't do anything then I would talk with the pastor and maybe he/she could talk to the parents for you....

    Answer by mominbolt at 12:22 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • One sunday I'd stay and observe

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:26 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • You are not overreacting. Your child is getting hurt by another child. This is not acceptable, even if it's happening at church.

    You've already tried to handle it with the teacher. She's either unwilling to acknowledge the problem, or completely unequipped to do anything about it. If she's sugar-coating it with you, you can bet she's had to do that with other parents as well. Your DS is just the newest target.

    You do need to talk to the child's mother. She may not even be aware of the situation. After all, no one wants to tell someone their child is being a jerk to the other kids in class. Just make sure you talk to her as nonconfrontationally as possible. Don't start out with an accusation, but with a question that invites her to help fix a problem between your two boys.

    I don't envy you at all. Be proud of yourself for wanting to fix it rather than sitting in the background just because you're "new". Good luck.

    Answer by kestrelscall at 12:40 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • you are being much more lax about the situation than i would be. i would have a meeting with the other kids parents, the teacher, and the director of the sunday school program. that is absolutely not acceptable under any circumstances and there is no way i would allow my child to be treated like that by anyone.

    Answer by Aurorasmom at 5:09 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • normally i would say to have the boys work it out and its something he needs to learn that not everyone is always nice, but he needs to be the best boy he can be.....but church should be a place you do not need to worry about bullies. it is a place you should be able to learn and be at peace. it is a problem you are not overeacting in my opinion. a person should have the right to feel safe at their church!

    Answer by LadyDahl at 9:05 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

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