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i cant call the cops but i need help

i was just assulted last night. and have a black eye and bruises all over. well my son and i live with him and his mother and use his car. (tech. i am married to him)
last night before i went to the hopsital i gave him the option. either i call the cops and he sit in jail or he let my son and i leave. he chose to let us leave when we can with out giving me any greife ..
the problem is, i have no family that will help me and i dont have a car or a sitter when i go to work. i do have a job and they gave me a few days off due to my accedent..
any advice? ive considered going to a shelter but how am i going to get to work? please help.

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Asked by sissiekat69 at 11:22 PM on Aug. 30, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (13)
  • Right now just worry about leaving. Go to the shelter they will help you get back on your feet. All you have to do is take that first step. If you cant do it for yourself do it for your kid. Be strong.

    Answer by treynlisa at 11:25 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • Good job on the leaving aspect, the woman's shelter is the best place for you and your son they will help you out there to get back onto your feet. They will provide a safe environment for you and they will help you find a job and get back into the swing of things. I would deffinately go there.

    Answer by Bluesdawg02 at 11:29 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • I agree with the other posters, just leave and you'll figure out the rest. Things always work out... Don't let yourself and your son remain in that kind of environment. You deserve better than that. What does his mother think about all this??? If it was my son, you wouldn't be the one leaving, he would!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:34 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • Are you Catholic? Call Catholic Charities there's counselling there. Call the hospital's social services they'll have lists of places for you to get help from. Also United Way's Displaced Homemaker's Group is very very good at helping moms in places like yours. Good for you for leaving. Put a picture of your baby boy how ever old he is in a locket around your neck to give you strength every second.

    Do you belong to a church, if so maybe they can help you and watch your son.

    Also, there might be a group in your area called interfaith Hospitality. It's a group of churches that take turns hosting familes w/ot a permanent home, for a week.Maybe there's a group like that near you.

    If your own family doesn't help you cause they don't like your partner that's really not a good enough reason to stay away from your parents, your family.

    If your family doesn't like you and your choices in life then think about sayin u chngd.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • go to the shelter .. they will do the rest if in a shelter they will start a case against him the state makes them

    Answer by peytonJJ27 at 11:38 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • i agree with anom he would be leaving.go to the shelter use w.e mmoney you have to go to work.being that you have a child the shelter will help you find a home and youll pay cheap rent.idk if all shelters do it but i noe a few people who are in it and they are getting there own home soon.keeping your baby safe is your number 1 priority so dont even think of going back did good on leaving.and i would still go to the cops and report his ass for putting his hands on you.

    Answer by Desi2Sweet at 11:41 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • i would like to acknowledge that tonight must be a popular night for upset males. I am sorry for you ! it's these days that aren't the ones women like us want to go through, being "IN IT". You're not in it unless you allow more. That is the smartest most loving heartfelt, intelligent and beneficial move to make. They will protect you with being annonimous, and it's confidential what you do as long as you remain there. >>>Meaning you aren't in trouble from him , or it's in the slammer he goes. REALLY. Get a report on him now while spending time at the shelter. Let time be your friend, and use him back the way he does you, (did)..... make him see the power you are getting that he won't be able to touch. He musn't come near you now ! and he CAN"t as long as you file this in police records and you still have lots and lots of time to do that. You are in shock....take your time. God will prolong your grace.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:41 PM on Aug. 30, 2009

  • umm call the COPS file a report and get an order of protection this way when he finds u they always do the order is in place and if violated its more jail time this is not the time to play nice and give options. the ball is in your court you got him by the throat while you still have visible signs of the attack get pics and let the police know they can also help you get a place there is alot of help out there but start with police i'm to assume you are a single mom there are gov housing and tons of gov help for single moms call your local DHS office dont go back, look ahead and realize know one deserves to be abused think of your child and know you dont want him in that kind of environment. i'm speaking from experience on all of this God Bless you

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:07 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Put him in jail AND leave him. Go to a shelter...don't be stupid, you have a baby in the middle of this

    Answer by Lauren24 at 12:34 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • We'll see if he still is willing to let you go after the bruises heal
    You'd be wise to report this, take pictures at the very least as proof of someone hit you otherwise you won't have a leg to stand on later because unless something was broke, there'll be no evidence.
    I'd report it anyways so it's on record, because if he hit you, then what happens when you leave him and he gets weekend visits with your child and 30 consecutive days during the summer alone with that child?
    Report it so that if it comes to custody, that you can request supervised visitation.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 1:16 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

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