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Am I wrong to want my sons Dad to take him for a week or two?

My sones 16 months old his dads seen him 3 times and lives 8 hours away. Alot of things happoned when I found out I was pregnat and I had to move back to my hometown with family! The mose time I have been away from my sone is 12 hours! I work full time and have his whole life. Lately one thing after another goes wrong I am so over whelmed. I just want a break!! His dad has all these excuses and clames he cant afford to come see him he drives a corvett!!!! I dont get it but I feel like if my luck doesnt start changing I am goign to have to admit my self to a physic ward befor I do go crazy!!! I have Ask hundreds of times for him to step up and help and just get more excuses! I dont know what to do any more!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:59 AM on Aug. 31, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (9)
  • wow.... you seem drained. What about either grandma?
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 3:28 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Another option is to try and find a sitter/nanny/mothers helper for like 2 or 3 hours every day or so.... and give the babys dad an ultimatum you're FRIED emotionally and need a break. Take the kid or help pay for some help!
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 3:29 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • PS ... corvette? please tell me u get child support?
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 3:29 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • No you are not wrong whats so ever, every mother needs a break, working full time and taking care of a child is really really hard work. Hope things look up for you momma
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 3:34 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I am the op
    He pays me 300 a month in cs he sends 2 checks a month for 150 each.
    I have my grandmal who helps watch my son while I work and my mom and dad help also. His mom never even ment my son! I get a few hours here and their every now and then and usally just sleep when I get free tiem b/c I am exsausted!
    xxstacixx720xx

    Answer by xxstacixx720xx at 3:41 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I personally could never do it. Especially with a child so young. Especially if your son has only met him 3 times.

    I feel you mama! DDs father tells me how he went out gambling, and part of me gets jealous. But most of me knows I am right at home where I belong. I'm a single working full time mama too. It does get tiring. I just make sure to stick to my routine to make things easier for myself and DD, and I don't forget to take us out for some fun. Yesterday we picked flowers and went to a petting zoo. It was free (except the ice cream) and we had a blast. Its all about balance, and knowing what you can handle. Cut out the things your can't.
    epoh

    Answer by epoh at 7:01 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You sound really overwhelmed & I've been there, too. See if your mom will watch him on your day off or one evening for a few hours. If not mom, do you have a teen neighbor who could babysit? You need some "ME" tiime! Right now, all you can think about is a break, and who could blame you. He is at that age where his only verbalness is whining & screaming, and it's tough. But YOU wouldn't last a night if you sent him to dad for a week. Also, your son would feel scared & abandoned by you. You would be handing him over to someone that he virtually doesn't know, that doesn't know his routine, and that hasn't learned how to meet his needs. He's at the age of "stranger danger" and separation anxiety and his dad just has a whole other world of people in his life who DON'T know your son. How will he be treated? What happens when his dad gets frustrated? What are their values? I couldn't leave him w/someone who didn't know & love him.
    doodlebopfan

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 8:09 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • (con't) If you did manage to make it for a few days, when your son came back, he'd be a whole other person having spent time away from you, but NOT in a good way. He would be clingy, crying constantly, possible nightmares from remembering the experience. And I'm not saying that your son's dad would be mean, but just that your son doesn't know him and couldn't express his feelings to anyone.

    I think you are focused on HIM taking him so that he could see how hard it is. So that HE could appreciate what all that you go thru everyday. But probably, it's not going to change his mind, and like I said, you and your son would be miserable.

    Find someone to watch him, or see if your mom will keep him overnight, perhaps. You need a break, but when you are refreshed, you are going to want to go get your son. You love him too much.
    doodlebopfan

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 8:14 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I have tryed to get my mom to watch him over night she has once she feels liek she watches him eanuf while I work and wont shes a first grade teacher and deals with kids all day at work to. I just tryed asking his dad to take him again and what does be do tells me he cant and its not his fault I moved 8hours away! I couldnt afford my apartment my roommate moved out and I found out I was pregnat and we broke up all in the same week I had no choice but to move 8hours to family and live with ym dad! Hes invited me to come live with him but then what do I do when things go south and I have no family where he lives and he doesnt have any family eather their! He asl brought up I should have got an aborcian when he wanted me to when we found out I was prego! If I could afford the coast of gas and a uhal to geth their I coudl pay my car payment thats now 2 months behind and me phone bill thats a month behind and all the other bills!
    xxstacixx720xx

    Answer by xxstacixx720xx at 12:15 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

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