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Marrige Counseling.....alone.....

So my husband and I are having problems. He is wanting to work on things and see if things can improve. We have a lot of things going on right now, I won't get into it.....I think he is open to counseling before calling it done, but doesn't want to go right now because he thinks that would stress him out even more. Is it only only a couples things, or something I can/should start on my own??

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:38 AM on Aug. 31, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Both of you need to do it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:42 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You can start on your own but for the marriage to work , you both need to work on it and that means both have to go. and as for him stressing even more...it sounds like he wants to ignore it to make it go away rather than to face the choir and learn that he has flaws too that he will have to work on.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:44 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • It takes two to make a marriage work.

    Good luck!
    LuvBug3

    Answer by LuvBug3 at 10:49 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You can certainly go on your own. I would worry though about him saying he is open to it, then making excuses why he can't go. That's a red flag to me. A counselor might tell you the same thing though. I mean, after a while they are gonna want the spouse to join the sessions and if the spouse is unwilling you may start getting some alternative (preparation) counseling from your counselor. That's what happened to me. Eventually the counselor started talking to me about my alternatives and facing the truth - a man (or woman) who won't see a counselor usually means that they don't think THEY are the one with the problem and THEY don't think THEY need to be fixed. However, THEY are usually very supportive of YOU getting fixed - that's a one-sided marriage and you have limited choices - one of which is to live with it or get out. Good luck to you - for your sake, I hope I am completely wrong.
    PaceMyself

    Answer by PaceMyself at 10:51 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I think that it would be good for you to go on your own. You can find more out about yourself and how you handle the difficult parts of marriage. He may see how counseling has helped you and want to start going too. Eventually I think that, yes, he will have to go too.
    momma_pam

    Answer by momma_pam at 11:06 AM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You should deff start going weather he goes or not but the ladies are right if he makes no effort to go your marriage will not work. But the counseling will give you the courage to do whatever you need to do. I hope everything goes well for you im in the same situation but my hubby wont go cause he is leaving 4 iraq.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You can start on your own
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:38 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

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