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My common questions section (may be offensive but most likely just funny)

Question: Am I pregnant?
Answer: Yes, you are due December 21st and are having twin girls! Contgrats!

Question: What should I do when my husband/boyfriend/baby daddy...
beats me?
Answer: Call the police.
Hurts my kids?
Answer: Call the police
Cheats on me?
Answer: Leave/divorce him.
Treats me like a slave?
Answer: Get a cattle prod and a to-do list and see how he likes it...

Question: What should I do if my kid is sick or injured?
Answer: Call your child's doctor.

Question: What should I do if I am having vaginal issues?
Call your doctor.

Any others that I missed?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Aug. 31, 2009 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • Agreed with anon 5:59
    MommyKKay

    Answer by MommyKKay at 6:06 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I like the part about the cattle prod. lmao!
    Skurvy

    Answer by Skurvy at 5:09 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • lol...lol...lol...still laughing...
    boredmom44

    Answer by boredmom44 at 5:13 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Q - Why are moms so mean here, everyone is bashing me!!??!
    A - Stop mistaking "Breastfeeding is best for mother and baby" for "You're an awful mother who will go to hell for formula feeding!"

    Q - I'm 37 weeks pregnant, how do I induce labor at home??
    A - For F sake, you can't wait 3 more weeks? You actually want to put your kids life at risk for your own impatience?

    Q - Why haven't you accepted God into your life?
    A - Because he didn't beother to personally invite me - he sent his annoying little minions.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:15 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • (OP) ^ I def should have added those!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:21 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Q - What is a health conscious and nutritionally balanced meal on a budget I can serve my small children?

    A- Top ramen, easy mac, spaghetti o's, and koolaid has vitamin c and a gallon is less than a $1!


    Q- Why come I gotted a million drrrrty looks at da store when i bought my shrimps prime rib lobster tales and pepsi this morning?

    A- Because you used an EBT card and then loaded your crap & nasty kids into an Escalade
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 5:25 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • What??? spaghetti o's, easy mac and koolaid are health concious??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:40 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Q: I'm so sick of hearing about Michael Jackson, Octomom (or any other celeb) Who cares about them?

    A: Ummmm...YOU do if you took the time to post a question about them! If you truly did not like them, you wouldn't waste your energy posting things about them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • My SO or husband abuses me and leaves bruises all over my body, but we have kids together so I don't know what to do.

    I don't care what anyone says, if a man is beating you, grab your kids and get the hell outta dodge! No excuses, I've seen women leave their husbands after the first time he hit her, didn't give them a chance to do it again.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:57 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You guys are funny but honest. The EBT and Escalade is crazy. LOL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:59 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

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