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Am I a bad mother??

My sons 1st birthday is coming up and I cant really afford to do anything big for it. I dont have much family or friend support so I was just going to take him to the zoo or something. I will probably get him a cake and ice cream as well. I feel bad because people always talk about the first birthday being so special and I know lots of people who go all out for thier little ones. Idk, Im just feeling really down about this the closer it gets.

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Asked by MikaNTey at 7:04 PM on Aug. 31, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (67)
  • no its about being with family and those you love and the memories that matter not how much your pocketbook took a hit for it

    Answer by peytonJJ27 at 7:06 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • We didn't go all out. Had a get together with a few friends and our families. But didn't do all this crazy decorating (to what....throw it away??) and I made the food and cakes. It's more for the parents than the baby at a year....they don't remember.

    Answer by MissHeidi0304 at 7:07 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • The first birthday is almost always about the mother - it's celebrating your survival of the first year, etc, etc.
    Your son won't really remember the birthday, :]. he will have photos to remember by.
    Sounds like you're going to do the best you can, and have fun doing it! It sounds pretty fun to me and perfectly fine.
    You shouldn't feel down. *hugs*
    Take lots of smiling happy baby pictures and messy cake pictures, and it should be a memory filled with happiness to share with him when he gets older.

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 7:07 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Personally I don't understand spending a lot of money on a 1st birthday! Your little one won't really get it anyway. Just be surrounded by loved ones, or even just the two of you....that's what really matters :)

    Answer by stepmom929 at 7:07 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • aww its OK mama! I could not afford anything at all for my sons first Christmas and my second son was sick on his 1st birthday! Take some pictures of him at the zoo and have a great time! Put them on here in one of the photo editing groups and have someone do something really cute with them! You dont have to do what everyone else is doing to be a good mom!

    Answer by stickyfingers at 7:07 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • BTW spending time with him and enjoying it is a great gift!

    Answer by stickyfingers at 7:08 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I had a lasagne dinner for just the three of us for baby #1. everyone cancelled on me so I just said WHATEVER! and had a party with us.

    a family BBQ is fun for the entire family - easy, cheap, and fun.

    Answer by hypermamaz at 7:08 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • You are going all out. As much as you can.

    Your love is the most important part of the day.

    My son's first was with family at home. I got him a cake from Safeway, a few balloons and streamers. He was oblivious.

    My son's second was at home just us. He had a chocolate cupcake and three balloons. Not much of a celebration, but he was much more excited. He was old enough to notice.

    Save money now for a big one when he can understand what is going on.

    We are hoping to take our son to Disneyland when he turns 5.

    Answer by 07upsydaisy at 7:17 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • Not @ all, they won't remember their first birthday anyway I think its better 2 do something big when they can actually remember and appreciate it.

    Answer by Red_Mama0723 at 7:17 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

  • I took my son to the zoo for his 1st birthday. I made him a cake, and we ate it at and opened gifts at one of the picnic tables with just a small handful of famiy members there.
    Just the other day he was looking at the dozen or so photos of that day in the photo album, and he thought it was really neat. He is 9 now, and he doesn't seem to have a problem with it. :)
    I woldn't worry about what other people do too much. It sounds like your family may be similar in size to mine, and it took a while, but I learned that small gatherings can be just as good (if not better, no feeding half an army of people you barely know or like).

    Answer by honeyb3 at 7:21 PM on Aug. 31, 2009

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