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What should I do about my child throwing a fit before school?

The first week of school was mostly just crying for my son but now his 2nd week in school he has started hating school and throws a huge fit when I try and make him go to class. A kicking and screaming fit I have never seen him do before. I am pregnant and can't physically carry him to class anymore. Wondering if anyone else has had a similar problem or ideas to help make this easier to handle.

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Asked by elmstreetchild at 11:03 AM on Sep. 1, 2009 in

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Answers (9)
  • How would you handle it any other time?

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:15 AM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • I would first tell him that it does not matter if he does the fit thing every day. He is still going to school. Then I would start taking things away from him that he likes. Tell him why you are do it.

    Answer by louise2 at 11:20 AM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Well, he doesn't have a choice about going to school. I would drag him there whenever the fit was over even if he was late every day and have him explain to the principal and teacher why he is late every day.
    You might consider his bedtime, too. My kids get super cranky in the morning if they don't get to bed on time and they like school. I can always tell when they stayed up past bedtime because suddenly they "hate" school and don't want to go and dawdle getting ready, making us late and then throw a fit about it.
    Last year bedtime was 7pm because they were up by 6:30am. This year I pushed it back to 8pm but if they start throwing fits they know bedtime will be 7pm again.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 11:50 AM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Routine from the time he gets home until the time he gets up in the morning. Wake up in plenty of time to get ready, do most things the night before, and allow him time to play for school. If he starts to whine or has a tantrum tell him its okay to be upset and he has a right to his thoughts and feelings. But your ears have the right to not hear his very obvious displeasure. Tell him he needs his own personal space and time. Place him in his room. Not for timeout. For personal time and to help him (and you) be more calm. He may resist the first few times. But do what you need to to leave on time and keep him away from you while he is having a fit. Or you can sit quietly with him while he is upset in his room. Then give him choices for the ride to school. Music, toy to carry in the car...just choices within your routine. Have someone else come over and drive him to school. Sometimes the tantrums ease when it is


    Answer by frogdawg at 1:01 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • not mom dropping him off. Sometimes it is dad and no problems. Whoever has the least amount of resistance is the one who takes him. Also if dad has least resistance getting him ready for school then you walk out the door before he needs to go to school. Try to create sameness and routine as much as possible. Reward him with kind words when he is doing well and even special treats when he has had a good morning off to school. Try to ignore and not react to his crying and tantrums. Your reaction goes a long way in helping him to ease off of morning anxiety.

    Answer by frogdawg at 1:06 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • You need to go to that school and find out WHY he's behaving this way at the thought of going. That is not normal. A few days of apprehension the first week --- yeah, fine... normal. But school for small kids (any kids, really) is supposed to be & should be FUN.

    If it were my child, I'd be concerned with how he's being treated by the teacher and/or peers.

    Get to the bottom of it, mama. SOMETHING is going on.

    Answer by Laura1229 at 2:37 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • just show him he gets nothing from the fit, tell him you undertand he is sad , and the preg may play into that regression too, fear of that change in the future.... just make sure he does not get his way by doing it and just grin and bear it, talk to the office and see if a male staff member can carry him to the class if you cant. good luck!

    Answer by AmaliaD at 2:38 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • How old is he? Kindergarten is very different from fifth grade!

    Answer by MonicaE521 at 5:30 PM on Sep. 2, 2009

  • I dont know what grade he is in but I just posted a similar question last week for my kindergartner. He is 4 and will be 5 at the end of this month. Most of the other kids are 5 going to be 6 so I pulled him. Hell go back next year. He was having the exact same fit. Its fear and if its bad enough you should find out what the problem is cause he may just not be ready. I dont care what any mom says about letting him have his way. These are not normal fits and he should be listened to in cases like this. If hes older than maybe their is something else going on but if hes little listen to him.

    Answer by lapetiteamie at 1:20 AM on Sep. 8, 2009

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