Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you give up your hobby to please your husband?

I am a SAHM to 2 kids. I love going to my yoga class once a week. This is the ONLY time I am away from my kids for 2 hours. I do look forward to this time alone. Anyways, my DH doesnt want me going anymore. He says if he cant go, its unfair that I get to go. We HAVE to do things together as a couple. Well, first off, he HATES yoga, and even if he loved yoga, his schedule at work wont enable him be there.

Now he wants me to give it up and find something else...something he also can do with me. I had a gym membership which I had to cancel because we dont have a sitter to watch the kids while we go. Its just so frustrating...

He came home with the Wii Fit and EA Sports active. He says I can do yoga at home if thats what I really want. Well, it IS what I want. I just want to go it OUTSIDE the home where i can talk to grown adults as well.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Sep. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • screw that! keep up your yoga its your thing he dont like it deal..
    peytonJJ27

    Answer by peytonJJ27 at 4:20 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • No I wouldn't, I'd just make sure I put effort into everything I had to do, so nothing gets left out.
    MommaRox4683

    Answer by MommaRox4683 at 4:21 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • ...he wont give up his hobby for me so theres no way i would give up my hobby for him!
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 4:23 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • I do my hobby at home so there wouldn't be an issue. I don't do it when he is here so there is no competition for my time.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:23 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • every mommy needs her alone time.. try to tell him that!
    Roxiannamomma

    Answer by Roxiannamomma at 4:26 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • In that case, no. There is NO reason why you can't do this for yourself. In all aspects, this is good for you, it makes you healthier, it makes you happier, and probably increases your sex drive and gives you some adult time with someone other than your spouse.

    Honestly, it sounds like an attempt to control you. And I would think the same thing if it was you trying to get him to quit going to the gym alone. There is NO reason why you have to do EVERYTHING with your spouse. Do you have to have him with you to go to the grocery store or the mall?

    Spouses should do a lot of things together and even look for more things you can do together as a couple. BUT, everyone needs their own things that they like to do alone. I take and edit pictures and DH loves to work on stuff, cars, the house, the yard, whatever...
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 4:37 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • nope, I wouldn't. he should be encouraging it, if anything. of course, every couple needs to do things together, but you both still need to be individuals and do your own thing once in awhile.

    maybe encourage him to find something outside the home for a night a week...might do him some good too.

    GL Momma =)
    carliemarie1015

    Answer by carliemarie1015 at 4:39 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • I'm gonna say what pretty much everyone is ...NO u shouldn't that is your time and plus why do u want to do everything as a couple? Its nice to do somethings but everything? I know couples like that and all they do is argue. I guess they spend too much time together and not enough apart. I don't know but to me he sounds like he is being a bit possessive...I'm sure he wouldn't just give up something he enjoys just cause you told him to do it just cause

    Skurvy

    Answer by Skurvy at 5:05 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • It sounds like he's just trying to control you. Dont let him. Yoga is not that big a deal for him to be whining about. I could see if you were going out to a club, he might be a bit put out....but yoga? Do your yoga and let him get over it.
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 5:17 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • It does sound a bit like he wants to control you. If this is the only bit of time that you have away from the kids and he wants to take that away from you, you need to talk about that. I love to do most things with my dh, but sometimes I need adult conversation too. We trade off, so he gets time to do his stuff too. It's not formal, but we talk about it.

    Now before you get defensive about it or whatnot, talk to him. See if you can find out why he doesn't want to let you go outside the house for activity. It may be as boring as money, it may be as complicated as he's afraid of you leaving/cheating/not being under his control. But one short evening a week isn't unreasonable at all.
    MonicaE521

    Answer by MonicaE521 at 5:24 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN