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My dads b-day is coming up and we do not talk.

Me and my dad do not get along. He's said some hurtful things in the past and seems as if he doesn't care to be nicer so that I can at least tolerate being around him. Last year I stopped trying and have choosen to love him from a distance. We have had no kind of contact at all. He feels like I need to call him though for some strange reason, but he called me in April on the phone and things blew up which lead me to say enough. So my thought was to send him a B-day card letting him know I wish him well and that I hope things can get better in the future. Letting him know that my door is open but that I'm waiting for him to do his part. What do you think? Should I send him a card? Leave him alone? What would you do? I do want him in my life but only if he's going to act right and be a good father to me. I cannot accept or tolerate anything less.

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Asked by SylviaNCali at 6:47 PM on Sep. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Level 17 (4,558 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • My dad and the three of us kids had a very strange relationship. My dad was old school, worked at his office, mowed the grass on saturdays, was strict with his children. It was how he was raised. My mom was the total opposite, so we were close. They divorced when I was 19. My sis and dad had a falling out and did not speak for the last 21 yrs. As my dad got older, he tried I think to be more emotional and close to me and my brother. But it would kind of come and go. He was a hard man to figgure out, but I loved him. On July 5th his wife called to tell me that he was in the pool, she went in to fix lunch and the neighbors found him floating face down in the water He had some sort of cardiac event and poof he was gone. You only get one never know when he won't be here anymore. Send the card, then you can say at least you tried. Good luck. I'd give anything to have him back.

    Answer by salexander at 9:31 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • aww i'm sorry to hear your father passed away like that. It is true we never know when our loved ones will leave this earth. I'm torn about sending the card but maybe just letting him know that I wish him well can do him some good. Thanks for the advice.

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 10:18 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Send the man a birthday card & sign it Love, Sylvia (or whatever your name is). That is it. Don't write a bunch of stuff in it, just send a simple card. Why make things difficult on your self?!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:59 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

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