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Boys and nail polish

My 10 (almost 11) year old son wants to dye his hair red and paint his finger nails black. I usually dont mind it when guys do these things but I have never had anyone in my family do it and now my son wants too and I am not sure how to handle it. My husband freaked out but I am all about freedom of expression and do what makes you happy but I feel wierd about thinking that my son wants to do this. SHould I let him do it if he wants or do I put my foot down and explain to him that most boys dont do this and try to spare him some ridicule in school?

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KiKiSoup

Asked by KiKiSoup at 9:59 PM on Sep. 1, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (22)
  • if a boy were to do that in my old school they would beat him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • I don't see anything wrong with the nail polish. My brother used to talk me into painting his black. lol!! =) I'm not too sure about the bright red hair though. Most schools won't allow the kids hair to be any crazy colors...only natural colors. At least that's how they are around here.
    Krystal.Ingalls

    Answer by Krystal.Ingalls at 10:04 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • um...no
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:10 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Well I'm sure your son knows how his classmates are going to react. He wants to do it I'd let him because it could hurt your relationship with him. It's his identity and how he wants to be I don't think it's a big idea but I can see where you would feel weird about it.
    heartfrommyson

    Answer by heartfrommyson at 10:10 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • If I were you I would try to find out why he wants to color his hair and paint his nails. There must be a reason to this behavior. I can understand that kids want to stand out in a crowd, BUT this is a little excessive in my opinion. I personally wouldn't allow this unless it was as a Halloween costume. Then again my kids wear uniforms in school and the school has dress and comportment rules, so the radical hair color wouldn't be allowed in school.

    BooBear666

    Answer by BooBear666 at 10:13 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • I actually asked my DH about this one, he used to do this sort of stuff. He said go ahead and let him do it, as long as he's not breaking any school codes. Or maybe he could wear a hat at school, you know your school rules better then I do.

    My DD used to do her hair a really bright burgundy, sometimes with pink stripes. Once she came home and said that a number of people loved it and that she must have a really cool mom. She even gave me a huge hug, which was very out of character for her.

    As far as your DH, just let him know that it's probably just a phase, the best way for him to get it out of his system is to just let him do it. (DH also said that if your son gets ragged on too much at school that he may just come home and shave his head, he did it once...but only because he got tired of the color)
    daisy521

    Answer by daisy521 at 10:19 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Well, if he wants to dye his hair, why not use a temporary spray in color, so that in case he doesn't like it, he can just wash it out? As for the nail polish, I know rocker boys wear it, but it isn't for everyone, and he might get teased. I'm all about freedom of expression too, but that may be a bit too much for a boy as young as him. Usually the guys I have seen wear black polish are at least fourteen or fifteen. Just talk with him and find out why. Maybe it's all the rage at school, who knows? If you don't make too big a deal out of it, he'll probably get bored with it and move on to something else much sooner. Don't freak out like it sounds your hubby has....
    chavela_carlita

    Answer by chavela_carlita at 10:19 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • As a general rule, I don't allow my DD to wear makeup, nail polish, etc - I am not terribly strict, but I don't think she should draw (negative) attention to herself when she goes to school. For this reason, schools don't always allow piercings, low pants, etc. As she is now 13, we allow her to wear make up for parties on weekends, etc.

    In our case, my kids love to get the henna tatoos - we have said NO when it was toward the end of vacation and they would have them when the went to school, so if they want them, they have to do it at the beginning of the vacation. I realize as kids get older, they need a little more freedom of expression, and such is tolerated when they are older.

    So, I'd apply the same rule to you son - I find he is very young for such freedoms of expression. Maybe let him try it on the weekend, during vacation or for a party, but not for school (and not until, say, HS).
    PhillyinFrance

    Answer by PhillyinFrance at 5:02 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

  • I think you should let him do it. If you have raised him in an open house were he is used to being able to express himself and have opinions then let him. It could be a phase that he is going through.

    I would make sure it is okay with the school, because you don't want him breaking dress code rules.

    I think it is great that you are open with your son and that he is comfortable to come to you with this. I think it shows that you have a strong relationship with your child and you want to keep that.

    Good Luck
    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 7:02 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

  • i dont really see why people r against this. ive never even heard of that being against the rules in a public school, i had rainbow hair in high school and im glad i got the chance 2 do it then because you cant do it anymore when its time 2 get a job.
    mudgirl

    Answer by mudgirl at 7:06 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

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