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Is it healthy to have baby fever after losing a child?

My son passed just a little over a week ago and i'm having baby fever.Is this normal? Within a few days after I gave birth to him, I had started to want another baby. Is this just hormones or am I crazy?

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Asked by zackaroosmom at 11:49 PM on Sep. 1, 2009 in Health

Level 5 (75 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I think it can be normal, because you are supposed to be holding a baby right now. I know how you are feeling, It has been almost 7 years now since I buried my daughter, she died after birth, it is hard, and take as long as you feel is necessary to grieve. I think it is different for every woman though, after I lost my daughter I couldn't be around babies, let alone hold them, I couldn't be around pregnant women either, it just brought back all the pain. Try counseling, I hope they gave you a memory box like they gave us, also try writing a letter to your baby, that is what I did, and it really did help me to get all my feeling out. Feel free to PM me if you want to.

    Answer by sylvia-ann at 11:58 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • It is perfectly normal!!! Dh and I both went on a mission to have another after our daughter passed away. Your arms were ready to hold your sweet baby and take care of it. Now you have this overwhelming need to fill that void!!! In time it will get easier. I promise!! Your heart will always ache for your baby boy but it will get easier!!! It will be 6 years this february that we lost our daughter. I still think about her everyday but now I have accepted it and have peace of mind that she is ok where she is and that I will be with her again someday!!! If you need to talk about things don't ever hesitate to pm me!! Love and Prayers momma!!!

    Answer by kristyn165 at 11:59 PM on Sep. 1, 2009

  • Well I'm at peace (right now)about his death. If he had lived, he would have soo many problems.
    His quality of life would not be the best. I know he is better off now. I'm also afraid to have another one. He was my second child to be in the PICU. I'm just afraid something would happen to our next child.

    Answer by zackaroosmom at 12:14 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

  • My middle son died before he lived a month. He never came home. While being devastated by the loss I was also anxious to have another child,. At the same time I was terrified that the same thing might happen again. What you are feeling is really quite normal. My youngest was born16 months later.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:44 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

  • Like the first mom said, i too didnt want anything to do with babies or be around them etc. and i actually had a friend that told me if it would have happened to her she would want another baby right away, and honestly at the time i couldnt believe she was telling me this, but now since time has passed i understand what she meant. i agree that what ur feeling is normal, it's actually a step ahead of the way i felt. ur aching for ur baby stetson, thats what it is. nothing will change or replace ur ds, but hold ur other two boys and talk to ur lil angel in heaven im sure u will feel his presence, at least through his brothers. take care

    Answer by carimo at 1:05 AM on Sep. 2, 2009

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