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I feel like everything in my family life is coming to a crashing end. My husband is depressed and I am going insane trying to juggle a house hold of 13 plus going back to school. and an impending thought of failure for the state exam I have coming up very soon. Any one know what I can do? or is there something to take? I've done all the natural approaches and nothing seems to work. my doctor prescribed me xanax and my symptoms seem to be getting worse. Some one, HELP!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:58 AM on Sep. 3, 2009 in Health

Answers (8)
  • Im so sorry this is happening to you! I cant be much help but I cant tell you NOT to take depression meds! They just make you cloudy and spacey and that always makes things worse! Im sorry to tell you love but all you can do is make yourself stand up, be strong and do what you gotta do! I dont know if you ment 13 kids but even so if you are taking care of 13 people they need YOU to be strong for them... I know its hard! I have been there... you will make it through! You just have to grit your teeth make it :) Maybe a daily schedule will help. I plan my whole month in advance so I just go look at my calender hanging on my wall the day before so I know what is going to happen. I hope I could help some! I will pray for you mama!
    ms_jackson

    Answer by ms_jackson at 5:41 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • Prozac, works wonders for me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:12 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • So sorry but if hubby is depressed, is he able to help out? Maybe start there to lift some of the burden off of you. Hugs
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 7:49 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • First, your problem can be resolved to some extent so don't give up hope. Ask your husband to do small tasks, like rinse the dishes off and put them in the sink or take the clothes out the dryer. If you have a household of 13, there must be older children in your home who can pitch in with regular chores. Explain to everyone you have to take an important test and for the next 5 - 10 days you will be preparing for it and that things are going to be different during that period of time. Write lists of things that absolutely have to be done and assign tasks. Minimalize your work load and get rest. Remember if you are not able to function, no one in your household will be able to function. Your husband may be on medication, but I would not suggest that you take meds. You are caring for so many people with little support and probably really need a respite from this burden. And ask family and friends for help.
    RosaRosa

    Answer by RosaRosa at 8:17 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • so there's 13 in your house? If you have adults or older children residing there why are they not helping you? My 3 yo has chores. Your husband needs to see a doctor cause depression is treatable and Xanex may b not be the meds for you. Give it several weeks to regulate your body.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 10:31 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • It sounds like youre taking on more than you can physically and mentally handle and thats common for moms. We've all done it at some point. If you have older kids, make them help. Everyone seems to be very critical of the Duggars when they make their kids help out, but theyre the first ones to suggest it to an overwhelmed mom. Its just necessary. Kids need to know that they are an intricate part of the household and they have roles and other people count on them. They arent just there to live life and do as little as possible. Your large family is a blessing and never doubt that, but you cant do everything. If you need to focus on school just for right now, then make a plan to push some of the other chores off your plate, even if only for a time, so you can get this done. I only have 4 kids and its overwhelming all the time too. Im working on a schedule for our family to ensure that everything gets done, but not by me!...LOL.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 10:47 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • Sounds like you're having a very normal reaction to some very crazy circumstances. It's already been said, but I agree - enlist your whole family to help. Don't attempt the Supermom act right now, and if you're a perfectionist...you'll have to let that go for the time being. Do the best you can and be kind to yourself. If your hubby is very withdrawn and depressed you may feel pressure to pull him out of it but he needs to seek his own help. I don't mean to be harsh, but that's not a challenge you should take on at this point. As far as Xanax, please be aware that it is extremely addictive. Use your judgement but know what you're getting into with that stuff, or any medication. It could make things worse. You can get through this one day at a time, or one minute at a time if need be. I wish you the best.
    mrspractical

    Answer by mrspractical at 5:29 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • I would just like to Thank everyone for their advice, of which I have found to be extremely helpful. I think I needed to know that I am not alone when it comes to being overwhelmed.
    acrussell

    Answer by acrussell at 12:29 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

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