Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how to deal???? Help?

I met my fiance when he was going thru a divorce, his kids are his everything It seems he puts the ex on the front burner and me on the side It hurts and I do tell him, he cannot do so much. I understand they are his kids but he makes it seem like he has no life other than the kids. We do everything with them. I just want some time to myself with him and my son also We have been trying for a baby for a long time and now I am 33 weeks, he is not working and he watches his kids during the day, sometimes keeps them overnight everyday I am so tired and I complain he needs to start work, he needs to do his best to look for something. Now he has moved out for the most part b/c he says he cannot handle my complaining, says the baby is not his to hurt me and now has changed his number. I know the ex has his # for the kids I am doing my best b/c baby but still to this day he is putting me last He tells me how much he loves me WHY

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:54 AM on Sep. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • I cannot contact him b/c I don't know where he is staying. We for the most part get along great we all have our ups and downs. Why can't he see past the part that he is no longer with the kids 24/7. I told him before he should not have left then. But he couldn't stay b/c he no longer loves her. Or how can I get past the part that I will always be last even after her! How can I get it through to him about work, it's just so exhausting and stressful. But you can't help your feelings? Any advice!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • His kids come first to him, that's an admirable thing - not a bad thing. If he left and won't give you his number, I would imagine things are over. I would have waited to get pregnant with him until things were the way I wanted them to be, not get pregnant in the hopes that things would become the way I want them to be.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • """But he couldn't stay b/c he no longer loves her"" said this about him and his ex=right?

    but he left you, when you are pregnant with his child and he says it is not his to your face
    and he did not even give you a phone number where he is !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    are you serious when you said............"""We for the most part get along great we all have our ups and downs"""

    sounds to me he gives you all the downs and saves the ups for his ex

    are you sure that he loves you said he does..........this does not seem like a loving relationship


    Answer by boredmom44 at 9:21 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • We were together for over a year before he lost his job, they closed down. Things were perfect. Then I got preg about a month after that. Then he slowly started changing.
    He left his ex b/c he came to the realization he was not happy with her. I know he does love me, he does almost everything for me. But he cannot see the problems b/c he is not outside the circle and he makes it seem like it's me b/c I complain to him. He said I blame it on him if he does not get a job. I don't but I do tell him he needs to start somewhere and continue to apply for everything. He has three children and that's when he began to say no I have two b/c I don't know if the new one is mine or not. He knows he is his but I am assuming to be smart and hurtful he says that. I love him regardless and you cannot help your feelings, I just wish I could get it past him to see what I am talking about!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Sep. 3, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.