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Question about baby sleeping

So, just for a little background.. I have an almost 19 month old daughter, who is very attached to me at night. She has nightmares/terrors and can't go back to sleep without mommy (we've tried getting my husband to get her back to sleep, and all she does is cry for me) Now, I also have a daughter who will be 2 weeks old tomorrow. Our routine in the mornings is when my 18 month old wakes up, usually around 4-5am, she comes in and sleeps in bed with me, and my husband gets the baby when she wakes up (for she is in a bassinet in our room). The past few nights, the baby will stay up literally from when she wakes up around 5, till 7:30 or 8 am, normally right when me and my other daughter are getting up, so my husband gets no sleep in that time.

What he wants to do is feed her, make sure she's changed, and then lay her in my daughters crib. He thinks that if the baby cries, that it won't have an effect (continued in reply)

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Skye-Angel

Asked by Skye-Angel at 4:23 PM on Sep. 3, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 4 (43 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • on her because she is so young. I disagree. I told him that would be like letting her cry it out and she is way to young for that.. besides we've NEVER let our 18 month old cio.

    Am I wrong for being upset that he'd want to do this? He says that she'd only cry for maybe 20 minutes at the most.. and I just feel like that is to much. Even though she is so young, I know that she won't cry for no reason!

    I am just looking for some input.
    Skye-Angel

    Answer by Skye-Angel at 4:24 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • you've never done CIO with her? oh so THAT'S why she's acting like that....but yeah 2 weeks you let her FUSS for a couple minutes, cry for about 1, as she gets older it gets longer.

    both my kids have been sleeping 12 hours at a night straight through since 6 months, along with 3-4 hour naps a day.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • i started letting my dd (second child, i SO learned with the first lol) fuss at 4 weeks old. i'd lay her down when my 1 year old went down, at 8pm, let her fuss. if she started crying and didn't stop after about a minute i'd go get her and lay her back down about 30 minutes later, which normally did the trick. as she got older, at 2 months i let her cry longer after she fussed, about 2-3 minutes. normally she was right to sleep, she just needed to cry for a lil bit. when she got to be about 5-6 months is when i let her cry for 10-15 minutes, (if she even cried) and then at 6 months when she woke up in the middle of the night i'd let her cry for 20 min., if she wasn't asleep yet i'd get her a bottle. after a couple days she would cry and then fall asleep, and then after a week she eventually just stopped waking up. did the same with my son
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:39 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • Yes, I agree with the other posters. I recently read an article in the NY Times that basically said mothers who know they will sleep train their children even before they have them have babies who sleep better and longer at night. Those who don't think about it or are opposed to CIO or some form of sleep training have babies who wake constantly in the night, as they are more likely to run to them at every cry. We started letting my DD cio at 4 wks. Granted she had colic so she cried all the time. Now at 6mos, she sleeps in her own crib for 10-12 hrs. a night! I never thought she would, since she woke up every 2-3 hrs for many months, but our 'tough love' totally worked. We did a sort of modify cio, where we went in to soothe her every 10 or 20 mins. without picking her up. It did not 'damage' my child. She is extremely happy and smiley.
    danielp

    Answer by danielp at 5:53 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • No offense, but people who tell me they never let their kids cio still have 1-1.5 year olds with sleeping issues and some are still co-sleeping at that age! I totallly think it's ok if you want to, but the people who I've talked to who do this don't seem to want to, they just have no other option. CIO is heartbreaking at first but it doesn't necessarily mean you shut the door and never come back. You can check on them and soothe them as much as you want!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:55 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • DO NOT CIO and kudos for not doing it with your other child. Not practicing CIO is NOT the reason your other child is a terrible sleeper. Both mine NEVER CIO and were sleeping through the night around 9 months old. you can let her fuss and see if she goes back to sleep within a minute or two but never 20 mintues of crying at 2 weeks old!!!! Even the doctors who advocate CIO don't recommend it before 3 months old. Why can't you put one child on each side and see if they will both go back to sleep and let hubby go somewhere else if need be to sleep in the morning?
    aeneva

    Answer by aeneva at 7:50 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

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