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what do you do when you know it's over?

After 16+yrs...I know deep in my heart my relationship w/ my so is finally over.
We both carry on like everything is normal. Yet, nothing is normal.
Sex sucks, it's no longer pleasurable nor exciting. There is NO spark between us. We no longer communicate like we used to & we fight over the stupidist shit now.
My so wants nothing to do w/ our kids anymore either, our kids may be grown ( 19 & 20 ) but they still look up to my so as a father figuer, and yet, my so is pulling away, keeping to himself on purpose .
I'm tired of pretending everything is " normal " in our relationship. I'm tired of crying becouse he uses words to hurt me, I'm tired of trying to kiss his ass 24/7 yet get kicked down every chance I get. I'm just plain tired of everything. I'm not happy, my kids are miserable & confused. My whole world revolved around him & the kids. Now, I feel like I'm alone floating in this wild untamed breeze.

What would you do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Sep. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Leave. ASAP. That's what I would do.

    Answer by louise2 at 9:39 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • i would get no i'm joking. Seems like your pretty well over it I would start building my own life. Do things you like to do and do things for yourself. Enjoy life thats what its all really about. Good luck and have fun

    Answer by Rebeccaroe at 9:41 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • I think that any relationship can be rekindled, as long as both parties are willing. It sounds like your SO is not willing. Have you gone to counseling? My suggestion is to make an appointment with a marriage counselor and hash this out there.

    Answer by jacobsmom707 at 9:44 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • You smile and thank him for the great years and walk out the door. Sometimes it is just time to move on

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:57 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • You know deep inside what you really want to do and I think you need to do what your heart and mind tell you to do. Good luck to you. And know that you deserve a man who is going to give you the world not make you feel like crud.

    Answer by suzyb1980 at 10:17 PM on Sep. 3, 2009

  • Does anyone take they're vows seriously anymore? Work on your marriage, sit down and have a heart to heart with your husband. Is he depressed and need to see a dr? Do everything you can to save your marriage and then take it from there. This is my personal opinion. Good Luck!

    Answer by roni2911 at 12:22 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • I think that life is far too short to be unhappy, whether in a relationship or not. You need to sit down with him one one one and have an open and candid conversation about where you both think that you are going. Sometimes after a long period of time the spark is gone and you need to rekindle it, sometimes the relationship is just over, and both of you must realize thaat and move on. I wouldn't call it quits just yet, have a talk, maybe try some counseling. Good luck mom!

    Answer by emnasmom at 6:39 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

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