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I'm so torn, I don't know what to do PART 2

up for adoption. I don't know what to do. I am so lost. I don't want to keep this child, can't think about aborting it or giving it up for adoption, so what am I supposed to do. Abort it & feel HORRIBLE about killing my child for the rest of my life. Give it up for adoption & feel GUILTY the rest of my life. Or keep it & SUFFER for the rest of my life, until I can get a good job & finish school. I don't want negativity, i'm going through enough as it is, I know I shouldn't of had unprotected sex if I didn't want another child, that's already done & over with, what I am supposed to do now?

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Ari0825

Asked by Ari0825 at 11:18 AM on Sep. 4, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (16)
  • You can always put "continue" on your question and then post an answer to it so that its all in one question... its less confusing for us that way!

    But to ad to what I had said early... there is a sense of guilt for giving a child up but the guilt isnt as strong (to me) as the guilt of raising two children with no money and making them suffer daily
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:20 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • so sorry about your marital problems! why do you think you would feel guilty about adoption? you would be giving a wonderful gift to a family with fertility problems. you might feel sad a lot about not having the child in your life, but your child would have a good family and life, so i don't think you would feel guilty. i am pro choice but i'm definitely not going to recommend abortion in your case because it does sound like you would hate yourself for it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:22 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • 1st off.. u need to STOP THINKING ABOUT UR DAMN SELF.. u just said a kid u created will keep u suffering. NO UR THE ONE MAKING URSELF suffer. u dont want neg comments but yet want peoples opnion. i also commented on ur 1st post.. i think ur thinking too much about urself and its sick. u made the kids u deal with the kids its the bottom line. if u feel ur goin to keep suffering then maybe u should go through the pain of giving up the child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:24 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • i am sorry that you are going through this hun. the only advice i can give you is let that poor baby have a chance at life if you can't keep him/her then adoption is the best way. and if you still want to be able to see him/her you can get an open adoption. there are alot of places that will help with health care and placement for the child. God bless you hun and hang in there.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • First off.. I'm not thinking about my self. Maybe I just worded it wrong, my kids mean everything to me and I wouldn't watn them to suffer b/c i wouldnt have enough money to take care of them all. thats what i meant. I am dealing with it, my kisd MEAN THE WORLD TO me, its sick that you would even assume that .. i wouldnt suffer becasue i have a nother child, i would love that child just as much as my other two, i dont want them to suffer. so you can stop being an ass
    Ari0825

    Answer by Ari0825 at 11:28 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • Well move in with ur mommy or some family and have them help u then bc u seem to think its hard on ur own even though u can get government assistants if u need it untill u get on ur feet. Housing foodstamps medicaid child care EVERYTHING
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:33 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • I didn't say it was hard. I am doing just fine with the two I have living on my own. I make it by & we are all happy. Adding another child to the equation is what is going to be hard, I have applied for acouple things for government assistance, they won't pay for my housing. I get food stamps & medicaid, yoiu don't know my situation, so you don't have to be so negative about evertyhign.
    Ari0825

    Answer by Ari0825 at 11:38 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • Don't get an abortion, you will never get over it. I was in a similar situation & I did have one. I wish everyday that I hadn't. I was very young & at that point I really didn't even think it was a big deal, but that changed quickly and every day I regret it. My advice is keep going with the pregnancy & see how you feel. My guess is if you go ahead & have the child a year from now you wouldn't ever be able to picture your life withut him/her & feel crazy for ever thinking you would suffer b/cof your child. But if time goes by & you still feel the same (before you give birth I mean) then look into adoption. There is absolutely no reason to feel guilty about giving the baby up. I think if you did give it up for adoption you should feel prooud & blessed that you were able to make such an unselfish choice. People who want children badly & can't have them will be the most loving parents in the world& the baby would be very lucky.
    shawneewaiting

    Answer by shawneewaiting at 11:45 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • CONT... Also if you decide to have an abortion, set up counsiling whether you think you will need it or not; YOU WILL.It's a life altering decision. Whatever you decide to do good luck. I'm so sorry for your problems and I will keep you in my thoughts.
    shawneewaiting

    Answer by shawneewaiting at 11:46 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • haveu guys tried couceling, how about talking to a pastor? does he know your preggo again?
    piwife

    Answer by piwife at 11:51 AM on Sep. 4, 2009

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