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I'm not a whore....

I never thought I would cheat on my husband, when things went south with us I stayed in the same house with him until I got my taxes back so I could move out. Things were SO bad between us at that time and I actually met someone else who showed me sweet attention, attention I hadn't had in so long that I ended up having a 6 month relationship with him. I tried to justify it but no matter how you turn it, I wasn't divorced yet and it was cheating. I feel horrible, especially now that the relationship is over. I'm still not going back to my husband, our divorce will be final in October, and he knows about the other man too, I just don't think he knows we slept together. Should I tell him? I mean would it do any real good to come clean about it? I have asked God to forgive me, and like I said our marriage was just awful for so long, but I still feel like slime. I just don't know what to do...I never dreamed I would do this.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Sep. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • *OP* oh yea, we don't have any children together, he has a daughter, my stepdaughter, who lived with us but no bio children for me. She still comes and stays with me, we have a really good relationship, so no children involved in the divorce.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:28 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • No you shouldn't tell him. He already knows about the other man. The only reason you should tell him is if and only if he asks you. Telling him now would be like rubbing his nose in it. It would absolve you of some of the guilt but it would just make him feel worse. IMO, you should keep it to yourself unless he asks you directly.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:28 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • NO do not tell him. It would only hurt him. I happen to think he's just as responsible for what you felt you had to do. If he had taken care of business then you wouldn't have felt the need to go elsewhere.
    Of course, you are not a whore. Just try to make things better and tell him to help too
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:28 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • Don't feel bad... you were in your hearts and minds seperated. You were free (except for a piece of paper) to be with whom ever you wanted to be. There's no need to tell your soon to be completely ex hubby that you slept with this other guy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:28 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • Sorry, but you should feel like slime. Cheating is cheating, making excuses only makes you slimier.

    What is there to gain from telling your soon to be ex? Except hurting him more.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:29 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • *OP* I'm not making excuses, did I not make it clear that I knew it was wrong? Can you not read or comprehend what you are reading Anon 4:29? If I didn't make that clear let me make it clear now, I KNOW IT WAS WRONG!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:32 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • I met my fiancee a week and a half after I left my ex husband. We were technically still married..does that make me a whore to?

    Your not a whore OP. Shit happens and I am going to guess that your marriage was over before you even filed the divorce papers. Don't worry about it. Neither you or your ex would have anything to gain by you "confessing" to him. The marriage is over and it would only create unncessesary pain
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 4:37 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • question should be why would you tell me now?
    want is there to gain except to ease your mind
    do not hurt your soon to be ex anymore
    he lost likely already has a pretty good idea
    move on
    and it is pretty big of him to let you have visits with his child,

    so why piss him off ?
    boredmom44

    Answer by boredmom44 at 5:18 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • Don't tell him. It'll only hurt him and you'd just be doing it to make yourself feel better. He already knows you're leaving him, he doesn't need to know that you were showing him that little respect while you were still married.
    RhondaVeggie

    Answer by RhondaVeggie at 5:44 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

  • One relationship with one man while you were on the brink of divorce doesn't qualify as whoring in most people's books. Your ex doesn't have to know the gory details if he knows about the other man. You sure he didn't date?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Sep. 4, 2009

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