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i don't want no more messing around, i don't want anymore games, or lies, i want everything put behind, i just want it to be me and him and no one else. i want complete trust i want us to be happy and comfortable and to be able to talk about anything together.

PLEASE TELL ME another way to tell him this and let him keep it in his mind forever! im sick of being on and off, and sick of him thinking i don't like him and me thinking he doesn't like me. i want a final laydown law! i want him to know that i mean business!

WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO KNOW HIS STRAIGHT UP ANSWER because time in my life is running out and i need to get this message out to him.


Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:01 AM on Sep. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • premarital therapy! It can help give you the tools to deal with current issues as well as future. whatever issues you 2 have now will only be magnafied by getting married

    Answer by hypersquirrel at 2:06 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Why are you marrying him if he's the type to mess around? Doesn't make any sense. You can't force someone to act a way you want them to. Either accept them as they are or don't get married.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:07 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • If I were you I'd rethink marrying him instead of trying to change him. He's not going to change until HE wants to, and IMO, you should NOT marry him until he has proven himself for a very long time. Don't let what he says fool you, see it for yourself before you marry him. I'd postpone the marriage at leas for a year and if he doesn't prove by then, then get rid of him because he WILL NOT change, he will only let you down.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:27 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • If you are dead set on marrying him soon then you two need to work on communication because you are definitely lacking in that dept. You thinking he doesn't like you and him thinking you don't like him...sounds like both of you are waiting for the other to start talking and then no one talks so you just leave it at that and you are both bitter and insecure. I'd tell him straight up, if you cheat or lie (and about major things, little white lies like "that doesn't make your butt look big" are okay) then its done. No second chances. The first time he will be out the door. But it sounds to me like you don't have a solid relationship right now and getting married for the 2 of you sounds like you both are afraid to be alone but you don't really want to be with each other either. I'd wait to marry him for a little while to see if things change but nothing will change until you start talking to each other.

    Answer by amyrw at 2:34 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Dump him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:39 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • You tell him EXACTLY what you wrote in that first paragraph. Word for word.

    And if he can't buy into that, you tell him only this: GOODBYE.

    And DO NOT look back.

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:09 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • No don't tell him Im laying down the law. That puts ppl on the defense immediately. I agree with many other answers that have said not to get married now. Sounds to me that you both have a lot of issues to work out first. Don't go into a marriage already not trusting your SO. You will be setting yourself up for nothing but failure and heaven forbid you bring children into this mess. Just my opinion but best of luck to you!

    Answer by sara13178 at 6:11 AM on Sep. 5, 2009

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