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I believe in discipline and rules... the rest of the neighbors don't. Have I lost touch with reality?!

One of my neighbors stopped talking to me. When I asked what was up, she let me know she was upset I grounded my son from playing with hers (mine was copying his behavior)... Her son threatens, breaks things, steals, lies, and is sneaky. I discipline him when in our house for these things. Mom, when confronted, always has a reason that it is not his fault, that's just the way 6 year olds act, I don't see what the big deal is, he never does/says that at home... We spend most of our weekends outdoors and the kids all play together.

I have found out the other girl in this neighbor play set, well, same sort of issues with behavior and her mom doesn't think there is anything wrong with the behavior either.

Have I lost it? My rules are respect yourself, respect others, respect the environment. If you get in trouble at school or with another adult, you will get in trouble at home. Am I over the top too strict?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:42 PM on Sep. 5, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • You are good mom! And you are not alone in this struggle to get our kids to be respectful and have ownership in their lives. My boys have friends that are not allowed in my house because of the same things you listed above. These kids are rude, disrespectful and I blame their parents. My boys know that they are to be BETTER at someone elses house than they are at home. They are gracious (most of the time) and hold doors open for strangers. My oldest helps people with their groceries and says pardon me or I'm sorry when he needs to. Too many parent want to be their childs friend instead of a PARENT. It drives me nuts. stick to your guns on this one.

    Answer by babyboyzz at 1:49 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • You are on the right path!! I don't understand why people use that excuse... It's just the way (gender) is or that just the way (what ever) year olds are. It's only that way when you LET IT BE. I know that there will be "phases" where my child might throw tantrums, we get over it and then they do it again, but that's when I need to look at what's going on and keep doing the same thing I've always done for tantrums.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:13 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Yes children need discipline but that is provided no violence is involved in teaching them the right way to act or behave.

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 2:30 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Thanks so much!!! I'm not feeling like such a dinosaur now! I just called and thanked my mom for all the rules and discipline she gave us as kids.

    Answer by mnrsmom900 at 4:10 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Not at all. It sounds like your neighbors need some parenting classes. Children need limits, rules and consequences. That doesn't mean no opinions, decisions, or beatings but consequences for their actions. I think your rules are excellent.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 4:32 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Nope! You are doing fine. My neighbors aren't thrilled with me either because my kid has rules. In fact the "brats" have learned to use his rules against him. which is why he doesn't play with them anymore. Their mom thinks I am nuts, I think she is lazy. works out well.

    Answer by Liansmommie at 5:23 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Thanks!!! Glad to know there is another "nut" mom!!! Though, I tend toward thinking the other mom my have issues with feelings of superiority.
    Maybe we need group ... Rule/discipline nuts!

    Answer by mnrsmom900 at 5:47 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Just think in another few years when their kids have a rotten attitude, talk back, & are in trouble all the time at school, You can sit back & laugh and tell them they are just being kids.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 7:23 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • I have to wonder if the "_ year olds just do that" will still be her excuse when he is 11 and stealing money, or 14 and having sex, or 18 and drunk driving....

    Answer by mnrsmom900 at 8:03 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • I have learned ,if, you teach your children well,they may look at the water,but,they won't jump in. I also observed some of my children,badest,unmannered friends ,loved being in my home,and being in my home they learned how to show manners,and most important,the 2 young people,I'm thinking about are now,college educated and have kids of their own. The 1 thing that was hardest for me to accept was to stop blaming other kids for my children mis-behaving, remember our children are to abide our rules, I said this because I have 6 children grown kids,all are mind temper,educated, always mannerable,But 1 daughter,my 4th child refused to be obedient, I blamed her friends,teachers, even the church,but, it was her,finally ,when she became 21,she decided she needed her college edcation,she realized,we only wanted her to be an sucess in life. Don't give up on all BAD kids.Bad kids can become Pastors,Engineers,Policeman, Lawyers,etc.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:13 PM on Sep. 5, 2009