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My son wants to have a vasectomy - bad genes

My son is 21 and wants to have a vasectomy because he has bipolar disorder and common variable immune deficiency (CVID).

His two brothers and I have all have CVID. My oldest son had a baby die before birth, possibly because of CVID. We just found out my middle son's baby has CVID. My youngest son wants the vasectomy because he not only has CVID but he also has bipolar disorder that can also be genetic.

The 20 year survival rate for CVID is only 64% with medical treatment.

My son is the healthiest of all of us and has a good job. What would you think of dating or marrying a man with a vasectomy? Would you be OK with having a baby with donor sperm?

Answer Question
 
GailllAZ

Asked by GailllAZ at 3:37 PM on Sep. 5, 2009 in Health

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • there are plenty of women out there who dont want to have children

    does he want to have a baby with a woman with another mans sperm?

    i'd say he'd be better off adopting
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 3:40 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • i wouldnt mind having a baby with donor sperm, but i dont think he should get a vasectomy just yet... i also have bi polar and i kind of like it :p
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 3:42 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Ya there is plenty of child that want two loving parents he can adopt after he fines love. GL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • I wouldn't mind dating somebody who had a vasectomy. There are many other ways to have children when the time is right.
    Not that it's recommended, but if your son ever does change his mind, a vasectomy can be reversed.
    theutilitarian

    Answer by theutilitarian at 3:45 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • I doubt they would let someone with a life-threatening medical condition and bipolar disease adopt. He may want to have children.

    I like that someone says that they have bipolar disorder and kind of like it!
    GailllAZ

    Answer by GailllAZ at 3:51 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • yes Bi-polar can be genetic but theres only one person in my family who has it and thats my cousin. Also have you checked to see if stem cell research, cord blood, can help with CVIS just in case if he really did want kids thats always a possibility.

    Cord Blood helps with all sorts of Anemia, Leukemias, etc....you should do some research
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • i meant CVID
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:05 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • Lol yeah, I'm bipolar and I've never had help for it because I know bi polar people on adderall and stuff and they are total zombies! I'd rather be 'crazy' than a zombie, although when I'm depressive its hard sometimes but I have a lot of support so I do okay
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 4:23 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • pookipoo: Adderall is for ADHD not Bipolar. If you have Bipolar, you need treatment.

    OP: Your son is an adult and if he feels that the Vasectomy will be benefical then that is what he should do. He has obviously thought about this and not taken it lightly. Have him talk to his doctor and see what he/she says. As for dating a man that has had a Vasectomy, if I love him it wouldn't matter. We could adopt kids. It sounds like he is a responsible young man that things about more than himself.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 4:50 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

  • I think your son needs to ask himself if he would be willing to raise another man's child. There are many single moms out there that would love to have a dependable man. Many couples can't have children for medical reasons and choose to adopt. When he meets "the" woman, they should discuss this matter deeply before marriage, obviously.

    I know a family in our area that the husband refused to father children because of a genetic disorder that he had. They used donor sperm from men that were close friends and had 5 kids. It seems bizarre but they are a very close family.

    My husband's almost-21 year old nephew has a primary immune disorder and I believe he feels the same as your son. He had a miserable childhood health-wise and has to receive medical treatments every 3 weeks for the rest of his life or he'll die.
    michiganmom116

    Answer by michiganmom116 at 4:57 PM on Sep. 5, 2009

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