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Yes, I do think my kids are special and I don't want them taught bad stuff

My daughters start Pre-K soon and I'm worried about something... One (4) just started playing a sport and on the feild the other kids grab, hit, talk kinda nasty (name calling, etc.), and are often out of control. A boy is always wrapping his arms around her and that's opposite of what I teach her (keep your hands to yourself, don't touch boys, etc.). At church some of the other kids (that will be in their class) are WAY out of control... running around, not listening, making a mess, etc.

I've worked HARD to teach my children appropriate behaviour. I honestly don't know if I can handle them being exposed on a daily basis to this poor behaviour. Does anyone else feel concerned their child will learn bad habits from other kids?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:25 AM on Sep. 6, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (6)
  • Keep right on teaching your child appropriate behavior. One day you will get a nice surprise when you see others around them acting like little turds and they ARE NOT following the crowd. You can't keep them away from the world but we can teach them about the world and how to act in it. It's hard, i know. But as long as you instill good values in them, you more than likely have nothing to worry about. They may do a stupid thing here and there, but address and correct that behavior when you come to it....things should be fine.
    momjoy1027

    Answer by momjoy1027 at 9:37 AM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • My husband plays soft ball and some of the team mates have children, who are not "bad", but do use sometimes words that I do not like for my little guy to use. I explain to my child, if he uses those words, that our house doesn't like them and why I don't like them. So far we have just banned stupid. As far as actions, I'm only his mom. It is only his actions I can assist him with correcting and making better choices.  I can't lock him away and never bring him out in public.  Whether he is on a baseball field or in Target, he observes others and their actions.  Discussion is the key.  Not loudly proclaiming the child and his/her parents are bad but in the car or at home talking about what you saw and why that is not okay.  Explain you are not that child's mom, you are _____'s mom and that means you have different rules and ideas about actions and words. 

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:38 AM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • You also have control over where you send your child. If you don't like your church atmosphere then you don't need to be attending that church. Find another one that fits all your needs. Find another sport or environment that maybe has better supervision. You are not helpless in this situation. You have decisions to make about which places to keep returning to and which places might be a bit too much. Your only other option is to never go out into public. That isn't much of an option. The moment she goes grocery shopping with you she observes others and their actions. Your influence is greater than any other's. If you think that a situation is harming her take her out of that situation. No need for distress just exercise good judgement on which situations are discussion worthy and which ones you just need to not return back to.

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:42 AM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • If you raise them right you should have nothing to worry about. No mother wants their child to be "bad". If your that concerned then home schooland stay home everyday.. There will be times that your child will test their limits and do things but it will all work out in the end.

    Mazie0723

    Answer by Mazie0723 at 11:09 AM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • No one wants their child to be taught bad behavior, but they will be exposed to it. Just keep teaching your children appropriate behavior and hope for the best. BTW, what is wrong with a child putting their arms around your daughter during a game? Maybe the other child was comforting your daughter because she missed a play. It is ok for kids to do that, especially in a team sport. If you don't like what is going on, you can take her out and not let her be exposed to other people or kids at all. You can always volunteer to coach her teams but be prepared for the parents that will blame you everytime their kid isn't played enough or they lose a game. Coaching isn't as easy as people think it is.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:36 AM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • Like you, I have taught my children proper behavior when out in public, etc. There are going to be children in every situation that doesn't behave in ways that you think are appropriate. I have a little nickname for these kids....it's OPK (other people's kids). The good news is that as much as you worry about how it will affect your children, when you have taught them properly they will not let you down. They may make minor mistakes, but they will learn the first time because it will crush them to realize that they have disappointed their teachers and parents. For the most part we don't limit the activities that our children participate in. When we witness inappropriate behavior we make sure to have a conversation with our kids about why what the other kids were doing was not ok. It's funny the insight that small children will have about these things too.
    slw123

    Answer by slw123 at 9:29 PM on Sep. 6, 2009

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