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I'm not sure how to handle this?

My mom hasn't talked to me since fathers day and she didn't come to our wedding and since my husband doen't approve of what my mom does (smokes weed) she doesn't like him now!? She just started talking to me agian about a week ago and we made plans to meet for dinner with the kids so she can see them. I told her that the kids are not aloud to stay with her anymore bc i can't trust her to not smoke around them(that's another reason why she wouldn't talk to me) so she finally accepted that and wants to meet. but she called me today and wants me to come to their cookout tomorrow i told her i wasn't sure and then my aunt called me and told me i should go and get over it. But i'm not ready to see my moms husband (which is an ass) bc he would try to start something with me and my husband was not invited! (He wouldn't go anyhow but he's my husband!) How do i deal with this without hurting anyone and without have a complete meltdown?

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sweetmissa47

Asked by sweetmissa47 at 10:03 PM on Sep. 6, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (53 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • thats not right that your husband wasnt invited. my SO's parents smoke weed, and they sell weed to their kids, and all kinds of ridiculous shit and i dont approve of it and for that and other reasons i dont get along with them and would rather not go to their house. i havent been there in a long time. i also dont want his mother watching our son because i know they all smoke weed in their house. my SO still doesnt think theirs anything wrong with his parents and we fight about it a lot. its a shitty situation. the only thing i can say from what i know about your situation, is that its not right that your husband was not invited. your family and your husband need to pretend they like eachother for the kids.
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 10:14 PM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • I wouldn't let my hubs parents watch our kids because they are drunks and pot heads. I don't care what someone does in their spare time but I don't want that crap around them. I still let them play with our kids and they have an open invitation to visit whenever they want to. In my opinion, it's not really anyones business what ANYONE does as long as it's not effecting you personally. If you want to see your mom then you should come up with a game plan. Make sure that she knows that behavior isn't acceptable around your children. Her husband, thats a tricky one. If you love him then he should be offered the same plan. What they do in their private time isn't anyones business. Being an asshole, well, some people are just assholes. If you have a problem with your hub not being invited then you should talk to your mom about it. You said that he wouldn't go anyways so maybe the problem is with your hub also.
    Katrina3016

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 10:30 PM on Sep. 6, 2009

  • If my dh couldn't go then I wouldn't go alone. Meet your mom for lunch or something when it's just you two and the kids. My oldest dd and I get into this all the time and stop talking. When we think it's time to kiss and make up we do it with just we two adults and the kids.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:31 PM on Sep. 6, 2009

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