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Should I go to neices b-day party if they never show up to our kids parties?

Look, it's not about people giving my kids stuff, it's just showing up to show you care. Every year my kids get shafted, no one shows up for their b-days, not even a card or a hello later on. But when it's time for neices and nephews b-days we get treated like we are jerks if we can't show up(I work weekends and invites are always last minute). And if we don't buy a gift or a card, it gets back to us from other fam members. So once again another birthday went by, where no one came even though they said they would and we are "required to show"for their kids. My daughter is catching on. It's hard for her to watch cousin open presents and have a party then no one comes or even gives her a gift. It hurts her feelings. Am I out of line here? I am considering not acknowledging any nephew or neice b days to be fair if treatment continues. I will not allow my child to be treated less than.

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on Sep. 7, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (11)
  • I would, I know what your'e going through, I'm having to change by daughter's birthday plans, b/c my whole family wants to control everything, and who can come and so on. I'd go it shows your'e the bigger person and have a forgiving heart.

    Answer by MommaRox4683 at 3:29 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • If it's starting to hurt your little girls feelings you could always just send them a birthday card and not go to the actual birthday. That way it will show that you did remember the birthday even if you were unable to attend for whatever reason.

    Answer by Krystal.Ingalls at 3:30 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • Yeah, I'm more concerned that my kid's get no acknowledgment from the same family members who ask it from us. It does hurt their feelings and that's what bothers me. I mean wow, not even a card, that's sad to me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:33 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • O would the bigger person..and its not your nieces fault that shes not going,its her parents

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:41 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • I wouldn't go. Sometimes being the bigger person is overrated. They don't respect you or care for your children . . . so why should you go out of your way. When they say something just fire back with "Well . . I didn't want (your child's name) to see that everyone makes it to (niece's name) party, but never come to hers. Make them feel like the assholes they are. I would not go.

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 4:26 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • no way! stay home! ! I am the type of person that if you don't come to my things were not going to yours. I stopped christmas at my grams because the other kids got treated better!!! STAY HOME! and don't send anything either...

    Answer by r00j04j08 at 4:29 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • We are supposed to teach our kids,it's better to give then receive,but,this is so hard for kids,if, you are going to parties,and your family are not showing enough love or respect towards your DD to come to her party, then, you shouldn't feel bad,now,if, your DD still want to go to the party and she is happy take her. Most kids, don't think about things like this, they just want to go to the party,if, it was me, I would probably go,they may be having some problems . Also, sometimes you have to let people know how you feel,without hurting their feelings. Make a copy of this post and give it to them.


    Answer by lady-t3984 at 4:32 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • I have had ppl be really rude since living here. My dd had a b-day pary last year and I asked for parents to RSVP. Would you believe that only one momhad the respect to RSVP? I was left haning about the rest and no one else showed. My dd had one friend,My brother and neice showed late,my Dad showed late and that was our ice skating party! My neice has huge parties. My SIL has a big extended family and has loads of so called friends. I doubt that we will go to her next b-day party because I have decided to just do the four of us for b-days from now on. Watching my neice have such parties is totally unfair to my kids. Plus I am sick of all the rude classmates parents. I understand your position!

    Answer by momthruivf at 5:46 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • The point is is my kids are having a hard time at these parties, and they are saying things. I feel bad.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • I wouldn't simply because I love my neice and nephew and would realize that punishing them isn't going to do anything as far as the parents go. I'm sure your neice and nephew aren't the ones deciding if they will attend or not.

    Answer by De_Chick at 6:53 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

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