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I handled this badly, and I want to fix it, but not sure what to do. My boyfriend and I were having what was a minor problem, and I wanted to bring it up so we could work on. My first mistake was doing it while I am PMSing, so I ended up having an attitude.

My second mistake was that since I couldn't get him in person, I left it on his voicemail. Now he's mad at me, and I'm not saying he's wrong to be mad. But he won't call me back so we can try to talk it out. I have left him messages telling him I love him, I want to talk, and gently reminding him that if we don't talk we can't work it out and that the longer we go without talking, the harder it will be to start. The issue is not that big a deal, it's a very minor problem. I know I need to apologize, but I don't really want to do it on vm, I want to say it to him. But he won't call me back. Should I just say I'm sorry to the vm and hope he'll call me back then, or is it better to wait until he calls me and tell him instead of vm? I just want to make things right between us. I can't tell him in person, b/c he's in another state right now, which is why this is really bothering me.

 
tropicalmama

Asked by tropicalmama at 6:03 PM on Sep. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Level 7 (155 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • tell him that you are sorry on VM and be sure to tell him that you are a dumbass with PMS

    i am not kidding, making it a joke on yourself may get him to call back and men love hearing us admit that we are hormonal
    boredmom44

    Answer by boredmom44 at 6:09 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • I would just tell him sorry on vm and then leave it up to him to call you when he's ready.
    mummy22kids

    Answer by mummy22kids at 6:06 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • are you both 12?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • Yes, anon, we are 12. I had my first child at age 4. wth? People argue, it doesn't make us immature. If you don't like the question, hit the back button. No need to be a total bitch. I am asking for HELPFUL answers, not judgemental witches. Thanks anyway.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 6:27 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • anon 5:15 must be 13 and think she is so mature
    do not listen to her

    just leave message that is sincere, I'm sure it is not the first time you over reacted
    and be sure to mention in a humorous way your temparary insanity due to PMS is over

    I too hate to be in these situations, remember that men go to their caves to think =Men are from mars, Women are from venus
    boredmom44

    Answer by boredmom44 at 6:34 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • yep, apologize whatever way is available then drop the small issue. It is obviously your issue or he'd address it so let it go. You can work it out on your own. My SO taught me that when I kept trying to talk things out. He told me to work it out myself. I did and we don't have those issues that he thinks are silly to begin with. Pick your battles. let the small ones go
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:38 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • Tell him on the voicemail that you were wrong and that you are sorry. I know if this was DH and I, I would need to admit that I was wrong before things could get fixed. Also tell him that you would like to talk about the issues more later when you have both had time to cool off. Then allow him time.
    mandamitch

    Answer by mandamitch at 9:03 PM on Sep. 7, 2009

  • Thank you all for the helpful answers. I did apologize on his voicemail. He did finally call back, and as it turned out, while he was upset with me, the reason he wasn't calling back was b/c he was sick. He'd gotten sick right after our last conversation, and he was too sick to even get his voicemails. Thank you all so much for your very helpful answers, though. I do appreciate them.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:38 AM on Sep. 8, 2009