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Tween Changing Into Sexy Clothes At School

Picked up my 12 year old sd at school and she was wearing a shorter skirt and low cut shirt, it wasn't what she was wearing when she left home! Somehow it passed the dresscode, but after talking with her, she admitted that she changes into different clothes at school. We had bought her some really nice back to school clothes, but the ones she changes into are not something age appropriate and not something her dad would approve of at all. I don't even know where she got all the sexy clothes, some of them she borrowed from her friend she said, her backpack was full of them.
So I asked her what it was going to take to get her to not wear those clothes at school, and she says nothing, because no one can really stop her she says. Her bio mom is not around at all, so just looking for suggestions and advice. Should I tell dad, let him handle it? Try and deal with it myself? Anyone had daughters that have done this before?

 
WishyClarkson

Asked by WishyClarkson at 5:09 PM on Sep. 8, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 9 (305 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (24)
  • OMG! I have read some of these responses and wonder what is wrong with some of you! Yes, it is a form of rebellion, Yes, you should tell her father, NO, you should not let her wear whatever she wants. She obviously knows that her clothing choice is unacceptable if she's putting it in her bag and changing @ school. I don't care how old my girls (right now 9 & 16) may be, we live together, we are a reflection of each other and we will respect each other. If they want to wear inappropriate clothing to school, I have no problem walking them to class wearing my bathrobe & fuzzy slippers with my hair in rollers and cold cream on my face! Don't believe me...try me!!!
    bracketrat

    Answer by bracketrat at 12:23 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • let her dress how she wants -- let her express herself. dont dress her up in dollie dresses,and turtle necks for the rest of her life!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:11 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • God , at 12 y/o i was allowed to pick out my own clothes ... let the girl breathe!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:12 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • tell dad, show him what shes doing, if he wouldnt approve hell handle it, and check her backpack everyday before she leaves.. make her leave it downstairs and pack it for her than hand it to her once shes standing out side the door. but def. tell dad.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:12 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • what if the girl is wearing clothes that show her ass and boobs? would you let your 12 year old do that?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:13 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • "tell dad, show him what shes doing, if he wouldnt approve hell handle it, and check her backpack everyday before she leaves.. make her leave it downstairs and pack it for her than hand it to her once shes standing out side the door. but def. tell dad."

    Agreed.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:14 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • tell dad, show him what shes doing, if he wouldnt approve hell handle it, and check her backpack everyday before she leaves.. make her leave it downstairs and pack it for her than hand it to her once shes standing out side the door. but def. tell dad.
    ---
    oh yes , treat her like a 2 y/o , pack her lunch for her as well
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:14 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • i hope this girl realizes she has no freedom in your home and runs away SOON!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:14 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • oh yes , treat her like a 2 y/o , pack her lunch for her as well --- She is 12....not 16!!!!! Would you allow your 12 year old daughter to dress slutty for school??

    If she is wearing clothing that is revealing or inappropriate for her age, then yes tell her dad. Pop up at school in the day a few times to show her that you will find out. Hopefully she'll stop wearing short skirts and low tops at 12 years old!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • Some of you people are ridiculous. God forbid SOMEBODY actually cares about how their child looks at school and the impressions that they may be giving off. God forbid somebody actually cares that this girl have some self respect or learn to value herself as a person and not an object. God forbid somebody decide they need to address a situation where their child is being dishonest and sneaky before it leads to much more serious "offenses".

    OP, Tell her father. Risk having her upset at you, risk making her feel like a "baby", risk it all if you know it's for her own good. You are her parent FIRST and her friend SECOND.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:21 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

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