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Apparently I am a HORRIBLE mother DS 6wks

I called the dr. to schedule an appointment do to my sons reflux issuse and that he has only had 4 BM's in the past three weeks he is srictly BF'd(i have gotten tons of conflicting information on this some say its fine some not). Well a woman for the dr office called me back to see if she could give me some advise. She told me that it is not reflux b/c he doesnt vomit every time (but at the last visit the dr put him on valtek 2X a day for his reflux) she said I am over feeding him and eatting the wrong food. So what that means to me is all of his discomfort and lack of sleep is MY fault. But I think I have a wonderful diet so I dont know what to do now any help PLEASE! I have been crying since we got of f the phone.

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Asked by Sbahns at 6:11 PM on Sep. 8, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (18)
  • Honetly i dont listen to nurses i dont pay thousands in health coverage to listen to i listen to the person getting paid the big bucks so just next time ask to speak to your doctor regarding that info and be sure to tell him she said that...

    your not a horrible mom, speak to your doctor next time

    Answer by Dom123123 at 6:14 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • Don't feel bad about what she said. I've always thought that medical staff lack the "human factor".

    I really don't know anything about reflux but I would considered asking the doctor to see a specialist.


    Answer by bringin at 6:17 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • If your confidante with your diet, then I wouldn't be to concerned with this persons opinion.


    Answer by geminisummerz at 6:18 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • You can call the home health hot line1-888-324-3243 and see what they have to say. If it's not he doctors words...I wouldn't listen. Does she have a degree to tell you what is wrong? I would ask them about the BMs too. They can give pretty good advice and they'll send you papers on the subject if you like.

    Answer by GotToHaveFaith at 6:19 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • I found this information in a government site

    Specific Instructions for Infants with GER

    If you feed your baby with a bottle, add up to 1 tablespoon of rice cereal to 2 ounces of infant milk. You can add cereal to expressed milk if you are breastfeeding. If the mixture is too thick for your baby you can change the nipple size or cut a little “x” in the nipple.

    Burp your baby after he’s consumed 1 or 2 ounces of formula. For breast-fed infants, burp after feeding on each side.

    Do not overfeed. Talk with your infant’s doctor or nurse about the amount of formula or breast milk that your baby is consuming.

    When possible, hold your infant upright in your arms for 30 minutes after feedings.

    Infants with GER should usually sleep on their backs, as is suggested for all infants. Rarely, a physician may suggest alternative sle

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • It's unprofessional & irresponsible for ANY staff to give out unsolicited "advice". Especially as a "call back". What it sounds like to me is this staff member (nurse or otherwise) got a glimpse of your appt notes and/or the staff was discussing upcoming appts and this person got it in her head to 'fix it' for you.

    Unless you call asking for someone to call you back with advice or someone calls and says "Dr. So-n-So asked that I give you a call....", it shouldn't be happening.

    When you go to your appt, you need to tell your dr. of the actions of his/her staff.

    Answer by Laura1229 at 6:24 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • My sister is a nurse and she can remember every patient she has ever had and they go through allot of schooling esp for thier specific area so i'd listen to her but i'd still ask the Dr. he may have a better idea esp if it might be a more serious problem. your not a bad mom bad stuff just happens i felt the same way after my ds got a clogged tear duct and a skin infection right after he was born and the fact that u r crying shows u r a good mom.

    Answer by deanna89 at 6:24 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • You can not overfeed a BF baby from the breast, BUT you can have an overactive letdown which can give reflux like up here
    Its NOT your diet unless its milk products causing an issue and you'd see bloody stools if that wat the case.
    Ask a LC about issues concerning BFing(even reflux) and join the Bfing moms groups on cafemom they help alot.

    Overactive letdown causes gagging, gassiness, arching backs, pulling up legs, latching and unlatching, spitting up, etc. Symptoms include spraying at letdown, pumping HUGE amounts, low weight gain in baby or very high weight gain in baby...

    NURSES are not trained in BFing, neither are doctors only IBCLCs are listen to THEM

    Answer by tabi_cat1023 at 6:37 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • If the doctor tested him for reflux and found that the baby has it and needs meds, who the hell is that person to call you and put the blame on your?! How dare she!!

    Ignore her. And report her.

    Reflux babies don't always throw up. That is not the only symptom of reflux...and with being tested, found positive and being given medications...she was WAY off base!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:56 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • My son had reflux, and he'd rarely actually spit up. You could tell the acid was coming up, but it would go back down. Also, EBF babies can go up to 10 days without a bowel movement after a few weeks of age. As long as when they do go, it is not hard, dry or pellet like, its fine. You are feeding your baby on demand, and tending to his needs. It seems to me that you are doing a wonderful job. HIS reflux has nothing to do with YOUR diet. Reflux in babies is mostly due to an immature sphincter in the esophagus, which is why most kids grow out of it. Set your worries on this matter aside, and if the meds help, continue as your doctor directed.

    Answer by Krysta622 at 7:06 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

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