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Never having an orgasam with my husband, to tell, or not to?

My husband and I were each others firsts and high school sweethearts, but i havent been completely honest, I hav been faking it our whole 3 years of dating and 1 year marriage. how i kept that up, i dunno. but its beginning to wear me out, and with a 9 month old, i just want to come! and sex , because of that, seems pointless. I point out what i want, but he doesnt do it long enough, no matter how badly i beg. he just thinks its enough to plow the cow *me*. and hes done.

so should i tell him or soften it or just keep trying to guide him? he has a VERY sensitive ego but after the initial sting of things, he takes it pretty well.
im only 18 guys, help me out!


Asked by shortycmlb at 11:51 PM on Sep. 8, 2009 in Relationships

Level 15 (1,987 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Well if you tried guiding him then I think it is time to tell. I had to tell my hubby that he never gave me one(i softened it a lil and told him he stopped just to soon each time). lol But anyway it was a bit of a blow... BUT now I get off everytime lol.. What I did was tell him what turned me on what didnt and kinda showed him by guiding his hand while he uh humm played lol. I had tried guiding before but it never clicked to him what I was doing.. he honestly thought I was enjoying it and trying to get him to stop. SO with some communication we have a better sex life.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:54 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • Be honest about how you feel, especially when it comes to this topic. It's the only way to resolve any issues you have. Who knows, you could have tons of fun exploring ways to orgasm. It's the only way to get to know what works for you. Effective communication is the best way to find answers. GL

    Answer by geminigirl18 at 11:55 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • I would try to guide him and see if that helps. If there is something that especially feels good the just come out and say "I want you to (fill in the blank).

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • I used to have the same problem with my boyfriend. Eventually, I invested in some lube and a toy b/c I tried my hardest to make him understand how I work, but he too, has a sensitive ego and I couldn't bring myself to just yell at him (even though I thought about really really hard on way more than one occation) but if you say he's takes it pretty well after the initial sting of things, then my all means girl, unleash the beast! lol

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 PM on Sep. 8, 2009

  • did you keep that up?? lol...well i'd say that instead of telling him you've been faking it the WHOLE time, tell him that you haven't really been pleased in a while...and that maybe he can do some other things, what you want, to help satisfy you. is it because he's cumming before you do, and just stops when he's done? if that's the case, maybe you can tell him when he's done that you're not. don't fake anything during sex, so that way he doesn't get the impression you're done too. maybe if you don't fake it, he'll be more willing to do more after. maybe he can finish you off with his fingers, or if you have any, toys. that way both of you get off. or if you decide to talk to him about it first, maybe he can start you off with fingers/toys before you have sex, and when you're ready then you have sex.
    also remember that some guys can't go too fast for a long period of time, they do get tired, you know, lol. GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 AM on Sep. 9, 2009

  • i know. sex lasts between 2-7 min though MAYBE 15 if i get *lucky*

    Answer by shortycmlb at 12:05 AM on Sep. 9, 2009