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How Can My Fiancee' And I Still Have A Relationship With 2 Small Children Controlling Our Every Move?

My Fiancee' And I Get Very Little Time Together, Maybe One Night A Month For A Few Hours If We Can Find A Babysitter. Our Relationship Is Strong, But Its Like, If We Arent Talking About The Kids, Laundry, And The In-Laws Then We Are Most Likely Sleeping. We Are A Young Couple, 21 and 23, We Are High Schol Sweethearts And Have Been Together For Over 4 Years. Before The Kids We Were Always Having Fun, Laughing, And Being Goofballs, But Sence Our Kids Have Been Here, Its Like We Are Completly Different People (or just assume so because we hardly talk anymore)... I Would Just Like Some Advice On How To Balance Our Family And Keeping Our Relationship Strong....??

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Keaton_Hazel

Asked by Keaton_Hazel at 10:55 PM on Sep. 10, 2009 in Relationships

Level 11 (597 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Put the kids to bed and have "we" time. Of course you are different people since the kids, that's what kids do to us, they change us.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:06 PM on Sep. 10, 2009

  • spend time being silly still, be silly w/the kids, spend time together (you don't need a sitter to do this, order a movie on payperview, play a board game, heck even just sitting next to each other and doing your own thing) you just have to make the time to do so. eat dinner after the kids go to bed, and determine there will be no kid talk or what needs to be done talk.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 11:10 PM on Sep. 10, 2009

  • of course you had fun before kids, you actually had the time to go out, didn't have to think of babysitter money, ect. before my dh deployed, we would have our times together. once the kids were in bed, that was our time together. we would also get a babysitter and go out once a month. believe me, once a month is great when you have 2 kids. it's hard not to talk about the kids, bills, what appts you have the next day, ect. so what we do is when he gets home from work, he normally plays with the kids (i'm a SAHM), while i cook dinner. during that time i tell him what happened that day, only the main parts though. like if our kids did something for the first time, how the doc appt went, ect. we would put the kids down for bed, and if there was anything we needed to talk about, we'd talk about it right then and there, and then go on with the rest of our night how we wanted to.
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 11:13 PM on Sep. 10, 2009

  • It's easy to have "me" time at night, after the kids are in bed. Like another mom said, play a board game. My hubby and I have done it....played monopoly for days straight at night and had a blast. lol. A have a designated "movie night".....have popcorn, candy, soda.....all you need as if you were at the theatre. Heck.....make-out during the entire thing if you want. Have fun. Be goofballs. thumb wrestle, pillow fights, anything to have some fun. And then on the nights you can get a babysitter, go on a date.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • We started finding quality time instead of quantity time. Sometimes just standing in the kitchen and holding each other will recharge our batteries. Dreaming about the future works good too, but also don't forget to enjoy life as a whole family. Before you know it, the kids are half grown up and spending a lot of time with their friends cuz "hanging with your parents is lame" or so a friend was told by her DS.
    You might also find that you get really good at quickies. lol
    daisy521

    Answer by daisy521 at 12:40 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

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