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I dont know what to do Im about to just lose it.

I left my ex , I moved to a different state and before I left he went to court behind my back adn had coustody put in order.
I had no lawyer I couldnt afford one .
I was young and scared and his lawyer pulled me to the side and talked to me alone which didnt help at all.
My ex was so abusive towards me and I tried to report it but the cops knew him and wouldnt.
I havent seen my son for 3 years because I didnt know I had to have it put in the papers I was moving.
I had to get away I was under his thumb . Still getting hit and couldnt even go to the store for food without someone telling him exactly what I was doing . I felt suffucated so I moved to try to make a real life for my son and I .
I have been tring to see him but his dad is a jerk and wotn let him come visit and likes to ignore my calls.
I feel so alone and lost I just dont know what to do.
Am I able to get my baby at least visits? IS it all lost?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:01 AM on Sep. 11, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • THERE IS STILL HOPE GO TO YOUR LOCAL LEGAL AIDE THEY CAN HELP IF YOU PARTENAL RIGHTS. FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT. I TOO WAS IN A ABUSIVE RELTIONSHIP BUT MY CIRCUMSTANCES WERE DIFFERENT BUT WHEN HE GOT OUT OF JAIL I WAS THREATEN ALL THE TIME BY EX. BUT YOU FIGHT AND DONT GIVE UP. LOCATE ALL OF YOUR STAT RESOURCE CENTERS SOMEONE WILL HELP.
    cat260

    Answer by cat260 at 11:13 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • You really need legal help. If I was walking in your shoes I would be reading up on my rights and figuring out what papers I need to file for visitation rights, if I am understanding you correctly you have none. Regardless of if he filed anything prior to you moving out of state, here where I live it's considered kidnapping if YOU didn't file the custody papers and if YOU took the child over state lines. I would check into your local government agancies for low income families and see if they can help, talk with whomever you can get to talk to you at family court. I would be chasing down every possibility everyday and not take a break till I got to see my child. Good Luck Momma!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:38 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • We have technically joint coustody but it was set up like
    mon tues wed -- Me
    thurs fri sat -- him
    sun-- trade off and on

    That is what our papers say
    It says word for word true equal and joint coustody
    but I had to leave the state I could not take the abuse anymore and i needed to better for my son

    Thanks for the advice:)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:42 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • YOU HAVE TO GET LEGAL ADVICE! This is not something you want to handle on your own! Try to get a free consultation from an attorney and see what your options are!
    Rebecca727

    Answer by Rebecca727 at 8:18 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • You need to go get a lawyer. That's the only way your are going to be able to really get help. Most have free consultation. I hope the best for you.
    Juggalette0327

    Answer by Juggalette0327 at 8:21 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • Call child support, they may have lawyers that can help you for free.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 9:33 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • sweetie, unless there is a family lawyer on this site, your looking for answers in the wrong place
    bi-polarmommy

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 9:57 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • I believe his lawyer was in the wrong by talking to you privately. You might be able to use that to your advantage, and say you were coerced. I'm not sure though. You do need a good lawyer.
    Krysta622

    Answer by Krysta622 at 10:08 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • Call your local domestic violence shelter. They have attorneys you can talk with and see how to fix this
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:20 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • Have you had any contact with your son in these 3 years? In some states (not all), it is considered abandonment if you have no contact for 1 year. Your ex may have had papers drawn up terminating your rights & since you left the state, he could have said he did not know where you were or how to contact you.

    If you have been trying to exercise your visitation & he has not allowed it, then he is in contempt of court. You need to start documenting everything. Keep copies of letters, emails, phone records. Start a journal/log of all contact.

    I understand why you left but would it be possible to move back to the same state, but maybe just a different town? My ex & I live about 90 minutes apart but in the same state. He sees the kids EOWE & holidays. If you don't live in the same town, you probably can't keep the visitation you have now but maybe you can find something that would work. Find a lawyer & good luck!
    funnyface1204

    Answer by funnyface1204 at 11:40 AM on Sep. 11, 2009