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question about R and R?

So my husbands deployed and well he had to come home for emergency leave for his fathers funeral in may...and the military told him it wouldnt be counted agaisnt him but when he went back to afghanistan they told him that he wasnt getting an R and R...CAN THEY DO THAT? im just so upset because he was suppose to be here for our daughters birth..this is the second time the military hasnt let him come home for our childrens births......someone please help me out....

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:10 AM on Sep. 11, 2009 in Politics & Current Events

Answers (8)
  • There is no suppose to in the military. My DH was in Iraq for 15 months and never got his 2 week leave. The military picks who goes on leave. If he does not have enough leave days to come home. Then he can not come home. When my DH was in Iraq, they where only letting the guys who had pregnant wife's go home to see the baby after it was born. The Military makes up their own rules about this stuff.


    Answer by louise2 at 7:02 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • but when he deployed he had given them the time he wanted to come home around...and thats why i said suppose to because he was suppose to be home a week before our due date....emergency leave is totally different from r and r.......most women i have talked to said its illegal for them to do that...thats why im trying to find out for sure to try and get my husband home for one

    Answer by SPC.armywife at 7:28 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • They might still let him go. When my husband was over there, he wasn't my husband yet but he was my boyfriend and the father of the child I was expecting. He was home on medical leave of absence for 2 months, and that's actually when I got pregnant. He wanted to go back after he got better and did, and finished out the rest of his 15 month tour but still got his 2 weeks leave toward the end of his tour and my pregnancy. He didn't think he would get leave though since he was home for those 2 months during his deployment.

    Answer by tnm786 at 7:40 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • uhmmmm....I would believe that he is now property of the U.S.Government, and can no longer make any decisions for himself. Until he gets out of the military, you do what they say.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:08 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • He is not entitled to r&r. Its just a courtesy. If he doesn't get it oh well. My husband has seen 1 of 3 births and adopted our boys by proxy. There is no 'supposed to' with the military. If the military wanted him to have a family, they would have issued him one. It sucks but, that's life. My husbands leave has been postponed twice and may get postponed again.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 8:27 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • Matthewscandi....I totally agree with you.  That is the way the military is.


    Answer by louise2 at 9:08 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • My hubby missed the birth of our first child and it was before the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan! The first time he saw our son was at the airport, I will never forget him pulling the blanket off the baby in his little carrier. Hubby just looked at him in total amazement. That look means so much to me. I think I would have missed it if he had been there when the baby was born.

    It was very hard to have the baby on my own though. Before the baby was born my Mamo told me about my uncle's birth. My Grandfather was fighting World War II. My uncle was 3 years old before he met his father. THAT was very sobering to me.

    Have you talked to anyone at Family Support. Does your hubby's unit have a Family Liason you could talk to?

    My thoughts/prayers are with you. If you have to, you can do it. Tell us when it gets close and we will offer tons of moral support!

    Answer by yourspecialkid at 9:25 AM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • sorry to tell you but people in the military do have a say...just because they are property of the government doesnt mean that they dont have a say in anything...apparently someone doesnt know anything about the military.....i totally hate when people that arent military wives think they know everything about us/or our husbands...dont listen to these people they dont have a clue....its not right that they took it away from him...keep fighting for him girly stick in there go talk to sure theres someone that will help you get him home...good luck and ill pray things turn out alright.....

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:05 AM on Sep. 12, 2009

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