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How many people tell you this....

My family and friends tell me I need to go out more. Go on dates with my husband more. Me and my Husband both work full time - I work days and he works nights. I get to see max from 6am to 8am when 3 days a week I drop him at school (part time daycare ) then my mom picks him up those days from daycare and I go pick him up at 5;30 each night. MOndays my husband watches him all day, He goes to bed at 7:30 so basically I see him 2 hours in the AM And 2 hours in the evening and all weekend all day. So I never WANT To go out - I LOVE spending time with him and even the bad or hard days I want to be there for!! My mom and sister say I need to "let go" a little so Ican maintain my relationship with my DH ( which is great anyway ) or get a hobby for myself, But I am not seeing a problem making him my whole life ? Is there anything wrong with wanting to never leave your child?

 
maxsmom11807

Asked by maxsmom11807 at 4:49 PM on Sep. 11, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 29 (40,703 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to spend time with your child, but balance is very important. Your relationship with your husband also needs to be nurtured. As long as you and your husband are both, and that word is important feeling good with the situation then there isn't an issue. Just be sure to communicate with each other honestly. Be sure that your husband knows that he can communicate his needs too.
    teamquinn

    Answer by teamquinn at 6:21 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • Well, if you never wanted to leave your child, he wouldn't be in daycare to begin with would he? And yes, there is such a thing as being overly obsessed with your child and NEVER wanting to be away from them. Time with your spouse is VERY important,and you need to have husband and wife time together in order to be better parents. It's important to show your children that Mommy and Daddy love each other, and value their relationship enough to want to spend time together alone. My husband and I try to have a date night at least once a month, occasionally, we get to have one more frequently than that.I have a friend who has a date night at home with her husband every Friday evening,with the kids there!She and her husband have date time, alone, for a couple hours, having coffee, chatting, while the kids are playing in their room or watching tv and they understand that it's Mom and Dad's time.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • I am a LOT like this, only we have pretty simliar schedules. We just CHOOSE to stay home with our DD. My parents are constantly telling me to bring her over so we can "go out." (but I think they just really want to spend time with her, LOL). I don't think it is wrong of you, but it may just be because I do the same!! LOL

    If, in the future, things get rough with your DH, then maybe you should try to focus more on the two of you, but if things are good and he is happy, too, then don't fix something that isn't broken!

    Good luck!
    Tiera12

    Answer by Tiera12 at 5:01 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • I can see why you'd want to spend time with him since that time is precious. I'm kind of the opposite- I'm a SAHM, my hubby works from 6am-11pm, so I have kids the 24/7. I feel like I need to get away much more than I do lol! Hubs and I try to go out alone once every 6-8 weeks or so.
    SahmTam

    Answer by SahmTam at 5:38 PM on Sep. 11, 2009


  • Don't feel bad about wanting to spend every free moment with your child, That is why you had a child. And you're doing what a lot of Mom's couldn't even conceive; you have a fulltime job and have a family... That's a tough thing to juggle!
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 6:01 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • I understand wanting to spend your free time with your child but mom and dad need time also, there is nothing wrong with having a date night with your husband even if it's only one or two times a month.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 8:14 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

  • the fist relationship in the world was that of a man and his wife. not the mother and child. so i can see where people are always saying that husbands and wifes need to maintain their relationships first.
    dayziesnrozes

    Answer by dayziesnrozes at 8:17 PM on Sep. 11, 2009

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