Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Backstabbing friend... what to do?!?!?

So I had problems with my love life/family. I confided a lot in my "best friend". Our daughters are the same age. They don't play great together (fight a bit) but they are both 3 and do have fun 1/2 the time. Anyway i was going through a really REALLY rough time and confided a lot in my friend. She was supportive but said that she didn't want to get involved (she likes my fam too). I wasn't asking her to be involved but I was asking for her to listen and be here for me (which she was). Things with the fam got really REALLY bad. They knew things that I had no idea how they would know. I only talked to my bff and sister about them. Fast forward to now- things with my fam and love life has gotten much better but I found out from my mother today where she found out all the things she knew... my BFF! When I was staying with a relative because things at home weren't good, she went to my house and told my parents everythin

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:55 PM on Sep. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • CONT- g that I told her in confidence! She has also been acting so weird lately with my dd. Everything she does she gets annoyed with (like talking loud). She is pregnant, but does that give her an excuse to betray my trust? To make things worse with my fam rather than better?? Her family is far away and she loves spending tme with mine. I always liked her hanging out too, but with the way she has been with my daughter and the way she betrayed me... I can't stand her! I confronted her but she said, "it was months ago, why does it matter?" I said because she betrayed me and it hurts to find out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • CONT- O I forgot to add... that while I was wondering how my fam knew these things I talked to my friend about it...s he totally blamed my sister so i was fighting with her!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:00 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • I hope you do not concider her your BFF anymore. What she did is totally wrong.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:04 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • She's not your BFF. I could keep things calm as she sounds like a family friend but stop telling her things. Keep it friendly yet distance.
    mommorgan

    Answer by mommorgan at 10:09 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • Girl, you gotta stay away from her...she might leave a bunny boiling on your stove or something equally as horrible. If she loves your family so much, why would she be trying to drive wedges into it? Then, she didn't even have the balls to be honest about it when you asked her...she blamed your sister, trying to drive another wedge. If she really loved you and your family, and truly thought you were in the wrong, she should have said "hell yes I told them because you're being an baby" (or whatever the prob was). Instead, she LIED! I hate liars. Don't trust her, she betrayed that trust once, she'll do it again.
    JawgaMom1

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 10:23 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • In your situation it seems that your "BFF" thrives on being the center of attention and she enjoyed you being the outcast. She liked the attention your family gave her. She's NOT your friend! I would break ties, but your family may not let her go so easily! Just limit the time you spend with her, your family will see her true colors soon (they should already see how she betrayed you). I wouldn't even give her a second thought, find a real friend! I have been in a similar situation, you are better of breaking ties!! 

    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 10:35 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • If she was truly your bff, she wouldn't have betrayed your trust. I think you need to backoff and stop doing things with her, I would definately NOT tell her anything. She had no right telling anyone what she told you and then blame your sister and cause more problems. You don't need friends like that.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:50 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Sound like she wants what you have. I think you should really stay clear of her. She sounds like Trouble. BFF's don't back stab !

    monijane

    Answer by monijane at 10:56 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • My mom used to always say never say anything to anyone you don't want the world to know. Write it in your home/personal journal if you just have to get it out.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:17 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • Wow, almost the same thing happened to me recently with my BFF and SIL. My BFF is from childhood, so I still will consider her a close friend, but I will also hold back a lot of information from now on. It hurts me because I don't usually depend on people for much emotional support, but when DH and I were going through some tough times I needed a shoulder and she was the only one that I could talk to. Well, she and my SIL have a friendship as well and SIL got all bent out of shape because she didn't know all the 'gossip' about DH and my marriage problems. And it was just when things seemed to be getting better.


    So, I called everyone out on it and let it be known that I was uber pissed about others interfering in my life, acting like it's tabloid fare. I think they are all embarrassed about their behavior because things have been very quiet around here since.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.