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how long do you keep your child in headstart when they hate it?

my son age 3 started headstart tuesday. hecried himself to sleep the night before. cried al lthat morning,& to school,when I left & picked him up. the rest of the week when I droped him off & picked him up. any time anyone comments on school he says he's not going back & he dosn't like it. how long do I keep this up? do I pull him out? will this affect him long term? am I just worring for nothing? my other children had no problems like this.

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Asked by 2ndsister at 10:34 PM on Sep. 12, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (10)
  • have you asked him why he doesnt like school?

    I would NOT suggest pulling him out of school. That's only going to teach him that later on if he makes a big fuss then mommy wont make him go. ...but of course, it also depends on WHY he doesnt like school.

    My oldest didn't like school when he was younger because he was mistreated by his teachers. Once he switched schools (he went from a normal child care center to Head Start) he LOVED it! it was great to see a change in his attitude towards school.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 10:40 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • i would keep him in cause he's going to have to go to real school sooner or later unless you are going to do homeschooling!?

    Answer by at 10:42 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • You need to keep him in. If you pull him out it's basically teaching him if he doesn't like something cry and mommy will pull him out. Chances are if you do it now he will do the same stuff once he starts school, you can't pull him out then.
    It takes some time to adjust to it, it's a big change.. My son acts out in school really bad (Im guessing thats his way of showing how much he hates it) but i'm just gritting my teeth and waiting until he becomes comfortable with it.

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 11:11 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • I would just make sure they are treating your son good and as long as they are, I'd leave him in. He has to get used to school before the real thing, ya know? My DD started daycare at 2 1/2. She really hated it and cried every day. There was a few things going on at that school that was NOT good so I did pull her out. I enrolled her in a really good preschool and she loves it. She even asks to go on weekends. Just make sure they're trying to comfort him and talk to him while he's upset, no just letting him cry all day. Goodluck!

    Answer by MarleighsMommy at 11:38 PM on Sep. 12, 2009

  • I would talk to DS and the teachers to find out why he is not liking it. Last year my nephew who was 3 at the time and used to being with grandma who let him do whatever he wanted started preschool at the YMCA and was telling these really bizarre stories so instead of talking to the teachers his parents just pulled him out, a few days later I was watching him and asked him why he was not going to school he said " My not like them tell me no" He simple did not like having rules because he was not used to them. When I worked at a Head Start (8 years) we had a little girl who was 2 1/2 who kept telling her mom we hit her which was NOT true, she had an older sister who had gone through our classroom so mom knew it was not true the root of the "problem" was she didn't like her cubby animal! CONT.


    Answer by goaliemom93 at 11:07 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • CONT>>>So talk to your son and his teachers even the director, see if there is a place you can watch him for a while without him knowing, he may just be playing you, the tears may stop within minutes of you leaving. Of course there could really be something going on and observing would help you get to the root of the problem.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 11:09 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • All excellent answers. Also, speak to the teachers, the family worker and/or the education specialist and see what they suggest. It may also be a good idea to do some of the activities at home that they do in school, such as read the same book, the learn/sing the same songs. Every child is different, his temperment may just be that he needs a little more time to adjust. It's really only been a few days.

    Answer by kjrn79 at 11:32 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • OMG! He's only THREE! Neither preschool nor headstart are required for 4 year olds...but a THREE year old?

    I have a three year old in preschool, but he has the temperament for it. He asked to go.

    Your son cried himself to sleep at night at the mere thought of going. That didn't tell you anything?

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • I hope it gets easier for him. it's more a seperation thing I belive. his dad & myself & his aunt are the only ones he's ever been left with.

    Answer by 2ndsister at 7:55 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • As a pre-k teacher I would suggest asking his teacher if there is any part of the day that he is interested in and then build on that. If it is rest time he is anxious about ask if you can send a small blanket or pillow that would comfort him...last year I had a boy in my class who did the same thing it lasted for at least a solid month. then it just stopped. I would definetley NOT pull him out! once he gets over this and knows he has to go to school he should be fine. and no matter how anxious and insecure you are NEVER show it. He needs to see that you are comfortable with him being at school. Encourage him as much as you can!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:59 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

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