Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What was your dad like growing up, and now?

Mine has criticized me and degraded me for years, even as an adult. He insults me about everything. Just today my DH, myself and my parents were just talking and I said I'd never want people to judge my value by how I look, because I believe there is much more that makes a woman valuable. My dad sarcastically asked "YOU think you're valuable?" I said "Yes,why?" and he rolled his eyes and said "pfft!" "If I was a young guy and I SEEN you out in public, I'd run the other way." "I don't like the way you carry yourself.." and started rambling about it, I kinda missed that part. For one thing, He did the very thing I said I didn't like, and When he asked me sarcastically if I thought I was valuable, he was referring to how I looked. Why would he say that? I don't get why he has to be such a freakin b@stard every time I try and be nice and start talking to him again. No wonder why I have self-esteem issues.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:00 AM on Sep. 13, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • BTW, this is coming from a man who tried to leave my mom for a good-for-nothing slut who was using him so she could screw the boss while he did her job for her (at work). I felt like looking at him and saying "Well yea, because you only go after the slutty, nasty ass girls who dress skanky, and someone like me would be too good for someone like yourself." but I didn't. I'm not ugly either. I'm average, pretty, but average. I dress casual, never revealing or anything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:04 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • growing up my dad was a god to me. he was in the navy always gone so when he came home it was the greatest thing ever, until we got into trouble than you'd better run b/c you're butt would get spanked soo much harder than when mom did it. when i was a teen not so great, but than again i was a teen, i can say he always stood behind me even if he thought i was wrong, he'd support me to my teachers, other adults etc...when we were home he'd then tell me that he didn't agree but no matter what he'd be there. now as an adult, i feel sorry for him really. my parents divorced a few years ago, he's trying to live his dream of traveling in an rv but can't afford to so has to work 3 jobs even off his navy retirement and disability. he's almost 57 years old and i feel like he should be able to relax a bit at some point but i've never in my life seen him do so. actually for fathers day next year all my siblings and i are sending him CONT
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 3:06 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • CONT his "Friend" (he can't say girlfriend its funny actually) on a 7 day cruise than to disney world b/c neither one of them has ever been.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 3:07 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • sorry about that. He sounds like a horrible father. I would rather be ugly than a horrible parent. You ARE valuable. You sound like a great person.
    bellasrose71008

    Answer by bellasrose71008 at 3:07 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • My dad was an abusive cheater who always made promises to me and broke them....

    not much has changed!
    colesmommy2009

    Answer by colesmommy2009 at 3:23 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • mine in a nut shell is same as colesmommy2009 so ditto

    but hes also an alcoholic but hes trying to change because im preg and i think he wants to make up for how my childhood went...at least his ex wife told me that

    well see
    Dom123123

    Answer by Dom123123 at 3:29 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • My father was a dead beat and an SO and still is a dead beat and an SO, ...except now he's also a "man of God". ...yea. go figure.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 3:30 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • My father and I were always close but ,we had our times that were touch and go. Today he is one of my Best friends.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 3:41 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • My dad and I were close until his affair. Since then it has taken some time to heal completely, but I still love him dearly despite his faults. We fell out a bit during my first pregnancy because he didnt approve of DH but he eventually came around. Now he is a proud grandpa of soon to be 3 girls....
    Princefan6684

    Answer by Princefan6684 at 3:51 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • i don't where will I be if not for my father. he has been my constant strength and provider of all the things i needed to go on life. he supported me in every decisions i made, even if i failed sometimes, he never left me. he wasn't very good in words but he did a lot in his actions. he never said a bad word against me or beat me. he is a good dad. i love him. ;)
    angel_caramel

    Answer by angel_caramel at 5:01 AM on Sep. 13, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.