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I'm fed up with it all! This is a venting type question...(adult language warning) - BUT AM I WRONG TO BE PEEVED AT THIS!??!

I am so sick and tired of my husband! I am pissed that he seems to just sit around instead of grow up! He is going to be a father in just a few weeks and I feel like instead of him taking up the responsible role, that instead I'm being given a SECOND child since I feel I also have to take care of him! I spent the whole day yesterday cleaning the room from top to bottom and putting together the crib and making everything ready for the baby, and while yes he helped pick up the floor and vacuum he also had shit just laying around and trash not in the trash can by the time I went to bed a couple hours later! Then today when I moved the trash can I noticed that behind the trash can had ants and food and that he hadnt MOVED anything when he helped me finish cleaning! I was disgusted! And then I confront him about it and he just seemed to slump it off! Am I wrong to be absolutely PISSED OFF?!?! I'm not his fucking maid or his mom!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:08 PM on Sep. 13, 2009 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • You are at the end of your pregnancy and yes it is wrong that he didn't do anything but I think that you are blowing things a little out of proportion. I remember picking fights over stupid stuff at the end of mine. I would let him know that you are angry that he didn't help and very upset over the ants and make it his responsibility to clean it up. Good luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 8:13 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • I would be just as mad!!!
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 8:15 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • well, you obviously are his maid if you continue to put up with it. dont do it. and im sure being pregnant is making this seem 20 xs more intense then normal. some dads dont really "grow up" until the baby is here... they sometimes say a woman becomes a mother immediately upon becoming pregnant, with the movements, the bond you have with your unborn child, and the father, who DOESNT have that, doesnt become a father until the child is born....

    who works in your family? you? him? both of you??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • Not wrong to be upset, but you should've noticed this behavior when you were dating. You can't change him unless he's willing. So looks like you'll have to clean house for your own sake and for baby's sake. Will his mom come help with the cleaning when baby is born?? Or better yet your mom?? You need to say something or make peace with it. You are not cleaning for him but for your baby's safety.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 8:16 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • OP here - Neither of us are working at the moment, we were both laid off this past year - me right after becoming pregnant. His grandmother lives with us, but she wont touch his messes anymore. His mother lives across the country or else she would help, and my mother wont help because she thinks it's the woman's job to do it. It never seemed to bother me before...but I'm tired and huge and it physically HURTS to do most stuff, but I can't just let it sit. I did for like a month, and it got so bad! I'm just pissed, I wish he would grow up already! He was, there for a minute, getting better at helping out...but then his grandmother started helping me out for awhile when I got pregnant and without him working both have driven him to just sit around and think it's all going to take care of things itself and it is driving me nuts!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:26 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • LOL Welcome to MY life!! I'm 27 weeks along with our 4th (and LAST!) and though he does what he wants, and he thinks he should be patted on the back for doing what he should had been doing in the first place, it seems like I still have to go behind him and re-do it! It sucks to feel like his mom and not his wife! I comepletly understand where your comming from. I'm SUPPOST to be on bedrest but how the hell can I do that when I have 3 kids that need my FULL attention because daddy has to be TOLD when to do something for them and HOW! Its ANNOYING....I have told him time and time again to GROW UP.....but hes a man. He will always be immature...thats why God made women!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
    angieluv

    Answer by angieluv at 8:39 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

  • maybe you should motivate him with a blow job in exchange for cleaning up. that always works in my house.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:47 PM on Sep. 13, 2009

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