Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Am I being a helicopter mom?

My son is in pre-K. His pre-K class is in a trailer located beside the school, but it is not entirely fenced in like the K-5 building is. Every morning I walk my son into his classroom; he puts his book bag up and puts his folder where it belongs. While he is doing this I give the teacher any papers that were sent home to be signed, inform her of anything that I think is relevant to his health, education, and well-being. I try to keep this short, because I know the teacher is busy. I then remind him to listen to his teachers and he gives me a hug and kiss bye. I noticed this morning that some moms just go to the door and then walk away, some moms stay in the car as their child gets out, and they make sure their child makes it to the door and then they leave the parking lot. What draws the line between being a helicopter mom and being a concerned mom who is involved in their child's education and well-being


Asked by Anonymous at 8:45 AM on Sep. 14, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (49)
  • My daughter is also in prek. If you are a helicopter mom,then I guess so am I. I do the same thing and it has not seemed to be a problem. I walk her in,she puts her backpack away,I talk to her teacher for a minute and tell my daughter to have a good day.


    Answer by mommythree0508 at 7:11 PM on Sep. 18, 2009

  • I think if you have the time to go in and talk its great, now if you were taking up a great deal of the teachers time or sitting in the parking lot waiting for him the whole time in class that would be to much, it just sounds like your an involved mom that has time to interact with the teacher.Some moms probably just don't have the time to go in.

    Answer by BusyBeesmom at 8:48 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Everything your doing is perfect! When your child gets into second or third grade, then he'll know the drill. But as for now, everything your doing will make him feel that much more comfortable and confident that he'll have a good day. Others moms are just go go go, be proud of yourself for taking that time and concern for your childs education, more moms should be like you!

    Answer by HaydensMama42 at 8:49 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • To me, if you're doing that every single day, yes you are being a "helicopter mom". I don't see any reason to do all of that every day. I have two in school and can't think of any reason why I will ever have to talk to the teacher every day.

    If you want to walk him in, do so. Let him put his stuff in the cubby and turn in his papers. Tell him good bye and leave.

    But then the teachers here (pre-k and k) have a folder that goes back and forth with the student. Papers and notes are sent back and forth in that. If we need to talk to the teacher, we either email, send a not requesting a call or go in and speak to them before/after class.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:51 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • "I have two in school and can't think of any reason why I will ever have to talk to the teacher every day."


     I don't talk to the teacher everyday, just when I need too. I will tell the teachers Good Morning and then I make sure my son does what he needs to do (he has some behavior problems) and then I leave. I am there maybe 2-3 minutes at the most.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Well, in that case, no you're not. But that's not how your first post came across to me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:58 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • When you start doing your child's home work and obsessing over every little detail of his day at school and his school work.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:06 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • I think you're just being a good mom...

    Answer by Skurvy at 9:07 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • If you are doing things that he should be taking responsibility for remembering to do, then yes...He can put up his bag and folder and give his homework to the teacher, that is his responsibility. But, I don't see anything wrong with wallking him to the class and informing the teacher of any issues as need be.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 9:09 AM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • op whatever with anon. don't worry with a prek child if you're a helicopter or not.. That is the time to be one if ever. If you were doing this in second grade up, that would be a worry. Doing this now will help you be ready for him to leave you for kindergarten.

    Ask for the teacher's school email, that way if weekly or daily folders are sent home you have a way to communicate easier than being anxious about time in the morning.

    One thing you can try for maintaining better behavior with your son in school is to come up with a code word that's said before he speaks periodically or does something. You would say it at home, in stores. The special word would code him to behave in certain ways and teachers would carry it on into school whispering it to him frequently / periodically during the school day to help calm down a tough time or to possibly prevent poor behavior.

    We did that with my son and it made a difference.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 AM on Sep. 14, 2009