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If a toddler bit your child or attempted to bite, how would you expect the bitting child's mother to react?

I am the mother of an occasionally bitting toddler and while I'm still trying to figure out how to curb the behavior, I do whatever I can after the fact. I have managed to stop actual biting from happening by placing my hand between my son's mouth and the other child, but the other child is usually upset from the bustle and grabbing that my son has done.
I think I've responded well and quickly...and I always see how the other child is and even appologize to the parent...but I'm wondering what people expect?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:33 PM on Sep. 14, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (11)
  • I'd expect some sort of discipline for sure.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • I would make sure to only play with children around his age group, almost all toddlers go through the biting stage. If you were at my house and your child bit mine (if you couldn't stop it beforehand) I would expect for him to get into trouble, whatever form of discipline that you choose to use. And after he gets a spanking, time out, talking to, whatever your choice I'd laugh it off and they would continue playing, lol. My daughter is 2 and just recently stopped biting so to me, it's more of just something they do. My son got out of the habit around her age also. They also bite when they are just playing, sometimes it's not done in anger or out of meanness and I think that should define what the punishment should be. If your child is just playing and bites, they are just happy. I'm not saying biting when playing is okay, just that they get excited and sometimes bite, lol. He'll grow out of it babe.

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 1:43 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Sorry, I ran out of room! Okay, to finish, you seem to be handling the biting nicely by watching and trying to stop it BEFORE it happens so I wouldn't really worry what other parents think. Crap happens, kids bite. If they get all miffed about it then just don't have your child around them anymore.

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 1:45 PM on Sep. 14, 2009


    Answer by angelairelan at 1:48 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Sounds like you're doing a good job, especially stopping it before it happens... I wouldn't be upset, as all kids go through this stage. I would expect (like katrina said) some type of discipline. In whichever way you choose.

    Answer by momma_marian at 2:05 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • OP here: I really meant to find out more about how you'd expect the parent to react TO YOU as the other parent. I just want to make sure I'm handling that part appropriately. Different children need different types of discipline...and so far none of the mother's I know think a 20 month old is "bad" for biting, they just don't understand. He's a very sweet child most of the time, however spirited, but he just has this biting streak that we're trying to end.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:09 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Ugh. Please do not bite him back or bop him on the mouth. My friend does this when her daughter bites my son, and it bothers me more than anything. My son and her daughter are the same age. I would expect the mother to watch her child closely if she knew she had a biter, and try to prevent the bites from happening. Like you did. A firm "no, we don't bite. It is not nice!" Maybe time-out, or separation as a punishment might help to teach the child to not bite. However, most parents know that kids go through some sort of phase. Whether it be hitting, bitting, hair-pulling, toy-throwing... just watch your child. If your child bites an stranger's child, or attempts to, an apology might be in order. Not because you did something wrong, it simply shows the parents that you are attentive to your child's behavior. But in the end, crap happens, even if you watch the kids like a hawk.

    Answer by ShadesofGrey at 2:10 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • I think you are handling the situation just fine. I'm often the "other parent" and I expect things like this to happen when two toddlers are in the same room. :)

    Answer by ShadesofGrey at 2:12 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • I would hope you would apologize and make sure my child was ok. But then it has only happened to my son once at the WIC office and then the other childs mother thought that I didn't see it happened so she completely ignored it! Pissed me off!

    Answer by jamesmommy12 at 2:14 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • i would NOT expect the parent to hit or bite the child just because s/he bit my child. i would just expect the parent to say "you do not bite!" and say "oh i'm so sorry" to the other parent.

    parents should understand that sometimes toddlers have biting problems! i guess some parents don't understand though if their kid didn't go through something like that. thank goodness my son never bit but i worked at a day care where we did have a biter and she always bit the same child :(

    Answer by Stefanie83 at 2:47 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

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