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Do you have a husband that doesn't understand the value of a compliment?

I don't know when it happened, but it definitely happened. DH just about never compliments me. The MOST I get the last couple of years is "good dinner, hon" ... great. We almost never get out, but have had a few social engagements over the last couple of months. I am usually in "mom" clothes, always cute and showered and with makeup, but nothing fancy... I don't expect compliments then, and I certainly don't get them, but for these special occassions I went all out, even did my nails, picked jewelry, spent way too much time on my hair and makeup... NOTHING. Anyone else have a husband like this? He used to think I was beautiful, now I'm guessing he doesn't.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Sep. 14, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • (sigh)...are we married to the same man?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:30 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • I feel your pain.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • some guys are just clueless to things like that.
    scooterpooter

    Answer by scooterpooter at 3:30 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • My husband explained it once to me like this. He had said it and said it and said it, if I didn't know it by now, i should. That immediately lead to a fight and he makes more of an effort now to tell me when he likes something. You might want to bring it up non-confrontationally and point it out. He may just assume you already know. He may really feel the way you think he does too. For me it was worth it to find out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • In hindsight years later, I'm realizing that my husband acted like that to me - indifferent -- because he was not involved in day to day care of our children. If yr husband is not involved in care of yr children with you it's reason for him to be indifferent.

    Maybe he works outside yr home and yr a homemaker, maybe u'r both working outside your home. Most likely childcare when u'r home days/nights has to do with u way more than him.

    It is not a law that he can not do childcare at night after work to give u breaks from daychildcare or yr day job outside the home. Involve him more giving him responsiblity of homework if any, play, childcare, nightime routines weeknights and weekends too and he'll most likely realize the amount of childcare that has fallen on u. It doesn't matter if the kids don't fight husband like u.

    That's not the point to have him deal w/naughty children.The point is fr dh to know job of parenting 24/7.
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 3:42 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

  • Mine isn't full of compliments either, but it doesn't mean that he doesn't think I'm beautiful. He just is not affectionate or romantic, and that's the way he is. On our wedding day, he looked at me and said "you look beautiful." Well I hold onto that compliment because it's gonna be the only I get for a looooong time! LOL! Men really are clueless but it doesn't mean he don't love you or think you are beautiful.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 5:45 PM on Sep. 14, 2009

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