Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Bad parenting?

I have been having a lot of trouble getting my 3 year old to eat at mealtime. This has been an on-going issue since she was little. It's not even that she's THAT picky. She just will ask for something and then refuse to eat it. It drives me crazy. Anyway, lately if she doesn't eat what she asked for then I tell her that she isn't getting any snacks until the next mealtime. Is this reasonable or am I going to give her more issues with food this way?

Answer Question
 
MamaApril2

Asked by MamaApril2 at 8:34 AM on Sep. 15, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • You are doing EXACTLY what our ds's Dr told us to do yrs ago when he did the same thing. As he explained to us, as long as you offer healthy, properly prepared and appetizing food with a nice variety (lol - basically what we all want to have), and you offer it on a regular schedule, then you're doing your job. If they refuse to eat, then fine, no snacks between meals. If they eat (even if they don't clean their plate or anything like that, as long as they're eating a reasonable amount for their age, size, appetite, etc), then having a snack later is ok. If they don't eat, no snack (though having the next meal a little early is ok.)

    Anyway, that's what we were told and did with both ours, and now they're teens, a healthy weight and no food hangups or anything, and they eat their meals :-)
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 9:07 AM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Oh, and by the way, I know it's hard, because she's going to be hungry, wanting a snack, etc. Just stay calm and firm about it. Simply say to her, "I'm sorry you didn't eat your lunch and now you're hungry. Dinner will be in a little while."

    Plus, I know it's hard, but just remember, sometimes being a GOOD parent means that we have to be a "mean parent" - we have to love them enough to do the tough things that we KNOW are good for them, even if at the time they don't like us very much for it. (You do get "paybacks" - our kids have actually thanked us on occasion for NOT letting them act up when they were little and they see other kids doing it - they will appreciate it in the long run :-) )
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 9:11 AM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • DONT feed him between meals. Your being a good parent. Remember, children that small will NOT starve themselves. They all go in spurts it seems. They go months surviving on a handfull of cherioos and 2 sips of juice a day for weeks then start eating again, Nothing for you to worry about. Your doing the right thing.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 9:12 AM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • My DS has done this a couple times at dinner. Refused to eat a dinner i know he liked or only take a couple bites that didn't amount to anything and then would ask for a snack an hour or two later. Sorry kiddo but you didn't eat dinner you don't get a snack. I would offer the dinner he didn't eat but if still refused it then he didn't get anything. I felt bad but he had to learn you eat what I make when its ready. He won't starve.
    nurbabe82

    Answer by nurbabe82 at 9:30 AM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I fix a meal and put it in front of them. They have choices....eat their meal, sit there and be quiet until everyone else is done, or go stand in the corner until they can do one of the first two options.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:28 AM on Sep. 15, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN