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If your child did this, what would you do?

We were at a large family gathering Sunday at my dh's parents house. We were all having a good time and then I asked my 13 yo SD to please help clear the table. She said "no". Then she asked her again, and Sd replies by saying " I don't want to F*** do it, I told you dumb bitch". Well my mouth dropped open, I was thinking " omg did she really say that?"
Dh got so mad at her he grabbed his daughter by the arm and dragged her outside so fast, where it was obvious they were arguing and he smacked her. He came inside and told me they were leaving, he was sorry about that happening, I could stay or go home with them right then. So I left with them, and his mom comes out to the car and tells him it was not neccesary for them to leave, that if she didn't want to help clear the dishes, she didn't have to.
Well I don't know what to think, it was bad the whole way around!
If this was your child, what would you have done?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:28 PM on Sep. 15, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (24)
  • I probably would have done what your husband did. And then would have told my mother to piss off and that she wasn't helping the situation butting in.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • omg i would have grounded her for a good while took all her things she like .. no phone no computer nothing and had a big talk with her
    ashley_nick30

    Answer by ashley_nick30 at 3:31 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I would've taken her home immediately and instituted a denial of privileges. She was extremely rude at a family gathering. I would also consider letting her opt out of some family gatherings in the future if she can't behave like a reasonably pleasant human being.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I would have taken her out and "spoken" to her, then she would have gotten her ass in there and cleaned the table by herself!!

    She's not too big to be put over a knee......
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I would have done the same thing and I would have told her to apologize to you. Then I would have told her if she acted like that to you or any other adult ever again the exact same thing was going to happen! And I agree with ashley nick, that I would ground her from everything until she can learn some freaking respect!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:38 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Nothing, your husband handled it. I would have cleaned up the dishes and left.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:38 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • TBH I never listened to a damn thing my SM said. She wanted me to help do the table I would have said "no" and if she asked again I probably would have asked if she was hard of hearing. LOL But my dad met my SM at 12, I wasnt close to my dad and she was just another one of his F**ks to me anyway, and look now their getting divorced, who would have known.

    I cant say what I would have done but I know how being a teen is and if I was asked if I wanted to do something and I said no and you insisted, I might think you cant hear....JMO
    Dom123123

    Answer by Dom123123 at 3:39 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Put a boot in her ass!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:39 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Turn it around, if it were your birth child what would you have done? I think, not having schildren and having a sil with a step teen son. that the level of respect wanted from kids to parents or step parents is universal and same no matter what.

    I leave when my kids have been bad, worse than naughty. I think yr sd behavior and mouth was more than cranky she was bad in voice and attitude. She not ony disrepected you, she disrepected her grandmother and other guests too and her dad.

    I side with her dad in leaving the gathering. Yr mil was just trying to save the day but I sure she was shocked if she heard the exchange between you and sd. It's good that yr husband felt his daughter was disrespectful to u his wife, his daughter's stepmom. Support for u with respect from stepchildren for any parent is important.

    I'd thank yr husband for standing up for you, although the slap was out of bounds,loss of prvilgs' is inorder.
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 3:40 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I also would have done the same thing as your husband! Then if my mom came out and said that to me, I would have to her thanks for the thought but this is my daughter and I will punish her as I see fit. My mom smacked me across the face when I called someone a stupid motherfu**er and you can bet I didn't do that again! I also turned out "normal", I don't have any psychological problems and me and my mom get along great.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:41 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

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